When Good Things Become Distractions

When Good Things Become a DistractionNot every distraction is bad. Some of the most dangerous distractions are worthwhile things that slowly consume the attention meant for something else. We do not have to be doing something wrong to find ourselves neglecting what God has called us to do. Sometimes we are simply doing too much of something good.

Ecclesiastes 3:1,“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”

Good Things can Compete with One Another.

Family, work, ministry, helping others, church, writing—all worthwhile. But none automatically deserves unlimited time just because it is good. The challenge is deciding how much time to give each activity. The old 20/80 rule is a good guideline. The first 20% of your effort produces 80% of the results. The last 80% of your effort produces the final 20% of the results.

So the question might be: which tasks deserve the final eighty percent, and which don’t? Are there other people who can fine-tune some things while you put your effort into the things God created you for? Does having control supersede accomplishing God’s will?

Luke 10:41–42, “You are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Perfection is an Especially Effective Distraction.

The things God truly puts on your heart require a different strategy. There comes a point when improving something yields diminishing returns. We can expend enormous effort to make something 2% better while leaving something else completely undone. The drive for perfection can reduce the likelihood of real change by causing us to miss the window of opportunity.

A need exists; you want to fill that need, but your desire to execute perfection causes time to escape, and the need goes unfulfilled. Or the need is met too late to be truly helpful.

This reminds me of a story from Kyrgyzstan. A young Christian in a Muslim village saw children playing soccer (football) in an open dirt field. He went to them, helped organize teams, and set up a small village league. While refereeing the games, he would ask the children if they needed anything. Then, during the week, he would get whatever they needed and give it to them the next weekend. This man knew their parents would never ask a Christian for help, but the children were different. It wasn’t long before he and his religion were accepted by the villagers.

Now, in America, we would first have to form a committee to make sure it was the best course of action. We would need rules and, of course, T-shirts. Maybe we would need donations for uniforms and refreshments. Then we would talk with the kids.

Perfection can get in the way of God’s work. God will perfect the outcome; we don’t have to worry about it.

Purpose Requires Periodically Looking up.

Ask: What have I stopped doing because something else has captured all my attention? That is the central question. Do I respond to opportunities by asking God if this is mine to carry, or do I let the world answer that question for me?

Do I ask God what my priorities should be, or do I allow my sense of accomplishment to overshadow what God is trying to do through me?

John 16:33, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Conclusion

Maybe the question is not simply, “Am I doing something worthwhile?” Perhaps we also need to ask, “Is this what I should be doing right now?” There are countless good things we can do with our lives. Wisdom is knowing which good thing deserves our attention today.

Those that Truly Lead, Inspire, Passing the Test of Life

Leadership Passing the testThere are leaders, and there are those who lead. Leaders may hold positions of power; those who truly lead inspire.

There is no louder voice in your life than your character’s voice. It is the steady drumbeat that reveals the consistency of your actions over time. I have watched people of character make incredible, self-sacrificing decisions without a word. They simply did what was right because it was right—nothing more. It cost them dearly, but not nearly as much as it would have to live any other way.

Luke 8:17, “For nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that will not be known and come to light.”

As we strive to become the person God created us to be, we will face hard choices. Those choices reveal our character. Character emerges when doing what is right comes at a cost.

Testing

To temper steel, it must first endure intense heat. The process makes the steel tougher by reducing its hardness. Life can do the same to us. We are tested in the heat of adversity, not simply to make us harder, but to make us tougher without becoming hardened. We learn to reflect hope by letting go of bitterness and to practice humility by turning away from self-centeredness.

1 Corinthians 3:13, “each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work.”

I’m reminded of a story in John chapter nine. Jesus encounters a man who had been blind from birth. His disciples immediately want to know who was responsible. Was it the man’s fault or his parents’? Jesus shifts their focus from blame. He tells them that through this man’s blindness, the works of God would be displayed.

John 9:1-4, “As He (Jesus) passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And his disciples asked Him, ‘Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?’ Jesus answered, ‘It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.’”

As much as I would prefer it were different, I have learned to see tests as opportunities to show others what my faith truly means. When I am in a dark place, I need most to let the light of Christ radiate through me. Darkness does not hide the light; it makes the light easier to see. These moments can become opportunities God uses to spread the Gospel through the way we live.

People within our Sphere of Influence

The people in our sphere of influence are watching how we live, and from what they see, they draw conclusions about our character. It is easy to project a positive image when everything is going right and all is well in the world. The real test comes when things are not so good. Do we still trust in Christ? Do we still project hope and reassurance when everyone around us knows our life sucks?

Ephesians 5:13, “But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.”

Very few people live in hopes of being tested. Most are like me: try me if you must, but please make it multiple-choice or fill-in-the-blank. I dread the big tests—losing someone I love, cancer, financial hardship, or losing a job. I know those tests will require supernatural strength I do not possess on my own.

But strangely enough, it is often the pop quizzes that catch me unprepared—you know, deception, anger, jealousy, impatience, pride. Too often, I fail them because I did not prepare. When the big test comes, I cram; I pray, read Scripture, and seek Christian counsel. Yet the pop quizzes arrive without warning and too often find me lacking. The Bible might describe it as a lamp without enough oil.

It is natural to turn inward during times of trouble. But we must remember that there are people within our sphere of influence watching what we do next. Some may never read the Bible, attend a church, or listen to a sermon, but they will watch us. What they see in us may shape what they believe about the God we claim to follow.

Created for Moments Like This

God has created you for moments like these. The God who spoke the universe into existence knows you, loves you, and has not abandoned you in the midst of the test. His testing is not merely intended to expose your weakness. It can become an opportunity to display His strength through you.

Paul understood this. Near the end of his letter to the Colossians, written while he was imprisoned, Paul does something remarkable. He does not primarily ask them to pray that the prison doors will open so he can escape. He asks them to pray that God will open a door for the message. His concern is not simply, How do I get out of this? His concern is, How can God use me while I am here?

Colossians 4:3-6, “At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison—that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak. Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”

That is leadership.

Conclusion

Be the one who leads—not simply because you have authority, a position, or a title, but because the way you live gives others the courage to keep going. Let your character speak before your words. Let your faith be most visible when it is most severely tested.

And when darkness comes, let your light shine brightest.

1 Peter 1:7, “so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

What’s the kindest thing someone has ever done for you?

Allowed me to help them.

The Consequences of Past Sin

Self forgiveness One unfortunate aspect of God’s love is that He allows us to experience the natural consequences of our sin. If there were no consequences, we would not learn to avoid sin. Sometimes the consequences last long after we have repented.

1 Peter 5:10, “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast.”

I know that, in my life, it means I live with some regrets. There are things I did before I knew Christ that still leave a stain on my life. I know the repercussions are my fault, but that doesn’t make them any less painful. I wonder sometimes how long I have to continue to live with the consequences. The truth is, maybe the rest of my life. Some sins affect us that way.

As Christians, especially when dealing with other Christians, we feel we should be forgiven. It is what Christ expects of us when we are offended. Why shouldn’t we expect it from others? Life isn’t that simple. God forgives; we don’t necessarily forgive ourselves.

Hebrews 8:12, “For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.”

There are many reasons the consequences linger. Sometimes the offended party has moved on. They no longer see the offense. It is a thing of the past that does not need revisiting. It is not forgiveness; it is acceptance. At other times, the offended person has forgiven but does not want to risk being hurt again. They don’t hold on to the hurt; they simply don’t want to open themselves up to it again. Then there is the obvious: we earned it.

Proverbs 4:23, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

The “we earned it” part is the hardest. It is an acknowledgment that this is on us. We built this house; we have to live in it. That belief can lead to depression or worse. Holding on to the truth that we somehow deserve what we are getting can drag us down. This fatalism carries a sense of finality. We submit to our circumstances. Fractured relationships may never become whole; they just become less broken.

Colossians 3:3, “For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”

These consequences are not God punishing us for disobedience. They are the natural consequences of living in a fallen world. Sin brings correction. Don’t mistake God’s course correction for us when He sees the need. By definition, it is not punishment but a means of putting us on the right path, sometimes with rebuke.

The biggest sins are not momentary lapses of control, such as anger or an outburst of discompassionate honesty. They are environmental sins, those that manifest as repetitive behavior over time. We become someone we shouldn’t be. These circumstances are hard to mend. Trust is fragile.

Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.”

This is not a solution; it is simply what I do. I try to live as closely aligned with God as possible, extending grace, compassion, and love to what I see as the offended party. I am not trying to explain or seek reconciliation, just to model who I should have always been. Letting who I have become slowly seep into their image of me. In a perfect world, they will one day initiate a discussion about it. But we don’t live in a perfect world, so I will accept that they may quietly acknowledge that I have changed. The offense will die as a new relationship is born.

Jeremiah 29:12-13, “Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

God is against sin, not because He has a set of rules we must follow to prove our allegiance. He created us and knows what sin does to us, and He wants to spare us that pain. We don’t always listen, and pain seeps into our lives.

But you are not who you were.

2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

What are the Four Important Lessons I have Learned in Life?

Life LessonsHere are the four important lessons I have learned in life.

Lesson One: Created to Glorify God

Ecclesiastes 12:13, “The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.”

God created us to glorify Him. Isaiah 43:7 declares, “Everyone called by My name and created for My glory, whom I have indeed formed and made.” The entire Bible supports this declaration. Everything we do with family, friends, co-workers, customers, suppliers, and strangers has one purpose; to glorify our maker. If we understand only one thing, it is this. We were created to glorify God.

Everything else is simply a resource God has given us to accomplish that task.

1 Corinthians 10:31, “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

Lesson Two: You are Unique and Perfect

Proverbs 16:4(a), “The Lord has made everything for its purpose.”

We were created perfectly and uniquely for the purpose God has for us. We cannot be like anyone else, and no one else can be like us. Even the attributes we see as deficiencies were created specifically to help us achieve God’s plan for our lives. These “deficiencies” are not to be eliminated but rechanneled.

God has a plan for all eight billion of us on the planet. Our plan may intersect with God’s plan for another, but it never replaces it. We each get to choose whether to follow. Look to God for guidance, not to the world. The world’s standards are constantly changing; God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

Psalm 33:11, “But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of His heart through all generations.”

Lesson Three: You are Where God has Destined You to be

James 4:14, “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”

In this exact moment, and in every moment, you are where God wants you to be. No moment can be repeated. There are no do-overs or mulligans. Every moment counts. Time does not care about your economic status, your resume, or your gifting: it keeps moving forward.

The Bible is full of stories about people who endured a wilderness season before God called them forward. Joseph suffered in prison; David fled from Saul and hid in the wilderness; Moses tended his father-in-law’s sheep; and Esther lost her parents and lived in exile. Mordecai said it best when he told Esther, “How do you know that you were not born for a time such as this?” He followed that with a warning, “And if you do not act, God will raise someone in your place who will receive your glory.”

Live this moment fully, and the future will take care of itself.

John 9:4, “As long as it is day, we must do the works of him who sent me.”

Lesson Four: Every Life Leaves a Sound.

Your life will echo through time. Neither the things that bear your name nor the inheritance you leave your family will create a lasting mark. People will soon use up what you leave behind, and each passing generation will remember less about you. But character, compassion, love, patience, and gentleness endure. They are the legacy passed from generation to generation.

You can choose your legacy or leave it to chance. Act intentionally or hope someone will see something good. Build things that rust and deteriorate, or create something lasting. You choose with every action, decision, and response. Leave something behind worth having.

Psalm 103:17, “But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children.”

Conclusion

Live a life worth passing on. Build a life of meaning and purpose. You will always know you matter. Your life will leave a legacy worth dying for.

Christian Leadership

LeadershipThe single most important thing a leader can give their best people isn’t perks or even money; it’s a goal worth their time. That is an important point. Whether we accept the role or not, as Christians we are leaders. As Christians, we are watched, and people decide whether what we say we believe in is worth investing in.

The Question

So, the question is: Do we give them a goal worth their time?

Hebrews 13:7, “Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith.”

What does your life say about your beliefs? I have written a lot about how precious time is. We don’t get do-overs for wasted time. That isn’t to say downtime is wasted, but is it intentional? Right now, I am more interested in uptime. What do we say to the world about how we use productive time to reflect a life worth living?

2 Timothy 2:15, “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.”

I remember reading that Christ isn’t just preparing a place for us but preparing us for that place. To me, that means the life we are living right now as aliens on this planet has meaning. The way we live here and now is preparation for eternity.

The Answer

When people watch us go about our everyday lives, do they see something worth aspiring to? Is it appealing to them? How do we handle disappointment and setbacks? Do we interact with strangers and those in need with compassion and grace? How do we celebrate success? Do we see it as a reflection of our achievements or as the natural outcome of a greater plan?

Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

We cannot always be happy; happiness is conditional. But we can be joyful. We can choose to see life unfolding predictably, even when we do not know the outcome. True followers know the outcome is in our best interest, even when it does not align with our plan.

We have an inner strength that gives us confidence in our abilities and keeps us from being dependent on others. We don’t compete with others because our plans differ from theirs. That is not to say we aren’t competitive, but that we see value in both winning and losing. Both have lessons worth learning.

Is there a calmness in our everyday life that is enviable? Is Christ merely a mythical figure who promises life after death, or is He real in the life I am living today? Does my life have meaning and value, or is it merely temporary and difficult to endure?

1 Timothy 4:8b, “but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.”

Is Christianity a goal worth my time?

Most practicing Christians ebb and flow. They see God’s hand in everyday events when they look for it, but miss the ones they were too busy to notice. Christians can see the value of compassion when it is a choice, but miss it amid a chaotic moment. They are good at implementing projects for the good of others, but often fail when life is thrust upon them.

We are all a work in progress. We are being prepared for what is next. Preparation is an active process that requires diligence and perseverance. So I ask again: As a Christian thrust into the role of leadership, are you giving others a goal worth their time?

One day at a time, one moment at a time, one decision at a time. Take care of the now, and tomorrow will take care of itself.

James 3:17, “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.”

I Wrote a Book

Echoes Through EternityI finished writing a book this week. It took more than two years. It wasn’t a biography or a memoir. I didn’t write about my achievements. It was about how I became me, about what happened in my life that transformed me and shaped me into who I am today.

Childhood Through Adolescence

I spent most of my early life very angry. Not at other people, but at myself. You see, I had a great father. He was a humble man who achieved great things. He quit high school at fourteen and became an itinerant farmhand, moving from job to job. When World War II broke out at 17, he lied about his age to join the Navy. He served in the Philippines on a minesweeper, clearing mines for beachhead invasions. He received two Bronze Stars for valor. His high school burned down during the war, which allowed him to attend college without a high school transcript. In college, he earned a degree in civil engineering.

He went on to become the Superintendent of Highways, the Chairman of our City Council, and the Chairman of the School Board. My dad was funny and never acted as if he were somebody. He was an incredible role model; he really was a good man. Dad was married to my mother for 72 years.

Somewhere along the line, I grew angry with myself. I never did enough, accomplished enough, or knew enough; I was consumed by anxiety about performance. That is the way I lived until my mid-forties. I wasn’t just driven; I was obsessed with my performance and accomplishments, never living up to my expectations. I was successful in business, but I never felt any relief. Despite all my earthly goods, I was not happy. By thirty, I was divorced and had a pacemaker. If someone tried to help me by giving advice, I felt humiliated because I didn’t already know what they were trying to teach me.

All of this was internalized. Outside, I was happy and well-adjusted. I didn’t want others to see my flaws. People saw me as intense and as someone who loved their work. I wish I could say that one day I broke and God fixed me, but that wasn’t what happened.

My Forties

One day in my forties, I picked up a Bible. Not because I felt God cared or even knew I existed, but because I was seeking answers. It helped. I read it cover to cover every year for about four years. I never once sought eternal salvation, only salvation from the life I lived. It calmed my anger and gave me perspective. It didn’t quench the drive within me.

Then, somehow, I came across a book by Lee Strobel titled “A Case for Christ.” Lee meticulously documented that every story in the New Testament is historically accurate. Christ lived, died, and rose again. He performed all the miracles described. I needed to go to Church. Who was this guy? This wasn’t a book of fables or stories; it was real life.

“If Jesus Christ was who He claimed to be, and He did die on a cross at a point of time in history, then, for all history past and all history future, it is relevant because that is the very focal point for forgiveness and redemption.” – Josh McDowell

Isaiah 44:22, “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you.”

I went from church to church in search of answers. I was not, and still am not, a fan of religion. Arbitrary rules were piled onto the gospel in an attempt to segment the marketplace (Personal Bias). I ended up at a gospel-teaching church that simply preached what the Bible says. No membership rules, no membership classes, just the gospel.

For several years, I attended this church and learned about salvation. But I was still self-driven. I was perhaps calmer, friendlier, and much less angry, yet I remained focused on myself. I now wanted to be the best Tomme Stevenson God could make.

True Conversion

Then one day, a friend gave me a cassette tape of a one-man play called “The Bema.” The question was: What have you done for Christ since you met Him? My answer: Nothing. This is where my book begins. This is where true transformation began. It was when I stopped looking only at myself and started looking outward.

The book documents how an extremely logical, pragmatic person met Christ. How Christ used my life to mold me into the person I was always meant to be. How the person I am today is a light-year away from who I was. It is the tragedy of wasting almost five decades chasing meaningless things instead of living the life I was meant to live.

1 Corinthians 1:30, “It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption.”

It was a lot of dumpster fires and train wrecks; I’m a hard guy to get through to at times. But every one of them had purpose and meaning. Every one of them changed me for the better. I started looking at God’s plan and moving away from mine: I started judging results not by what I wanted to achieve, but by what God had planned.

I am now more relaxed, still a type “A” personality, but living by God’s standard, not mine.  These last twenty-five years have been the best. The book is my best description of how that transformation took place. It is simple lessons from an ordinary life learning to live for Christ.

Galatians 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

P.S. if you want an electronic copy drop  me an email. It was created for my family, but otherwise not completely unreadable.

Whose Side Are You On?

Whose side are you on?,Whose side are you on? I forgot the importance of that question.

Today, as on many days, I struggle to make sense of my sin. I have a good life. I want for nothing essential. God has blessed me beyond my expectations. I am not rich by worldly standards, but I am rich enough. And yet I struggle much the way Paul did.

The Challenge

I have returned from a very trying trip to Honduras. The people are great, the food is great, and we are making very good progress, but it hasn’t gone smoothly. It took way too long to be granted entry to our quarters because the on-duty guard exercised his authority. The cars behind us in line were honking in dismay. He did not have to, but he could; he was the gatekeeper. The flight back was delayed and had several gate changes, pushing my arrival to 3 a.m. the next day. I didn’t react well to either of these situations. On a good day, travel is challenging; I’m experienced enough to know this.

One of the people accompanying me had a health issue, so I had to teach and write business plans. My schedule became highly flexible. None of this was outside God’s plan, but it was outside mine. It reminded me of a passage in Joshua.

Joshua 5:13-14, “Now when Joshua was near Jericho, he looked up and saw a man standing in front of him with a drawn sword in his hand. Joshua went up to him and asked, “Are you for our enemies or for us?’ “Neither,” he replied, “but as commander of the army of the Lord I have now come.” Then Joshua fell facedown to the ground in reverence and asked him, “What message does my Lord have for his servant?’”

The Reality

“There is but one good; that is God. Everything else is good when it looks to Him and bad when it turns from Him.” – C. S. Lewis, The Great Divorce

Joshua asked whether the angel was on his side or his enemy’s, and the Angel answered, “Neither.” I am reminded that God’s plan is always right and good, regardless of how it aligns with mine. Delays and changes do not affect God’s outcome. My stress and anxiety are mine, not His. God does not take sides. There is only one side, His.

Isaiah 45:19, “I, the Lord, speak the truth; I declare what is right.”

Sometimes my will overrides my common sense. God’s plan will always prevail. I am part of His plan, not the other way around. I was not in Honduras because I had a plan for the Honduran people I was an invited guest in God’s plan for them. It wasn’t my schedule that mattered; it was His. I will not see the outcome until this side of heaven.

I recall hearing this story once about Abraham Lincoln. It is said that a group of ministers approached Lincoln and prayed that God would be with him during his presidency. Lincoln did not want God to endorse his plan, but he wanted to follow God’s plan.

Abraham Lincoln’s reply was:
“It is my constant anxiety and prayer that I and this nation should be on the Lord’s side.” – Francis B. Carpenter’s Six Months at the White House with Abraham Lincoln, first published in 1866.

He didn’t want to proceed, thinking God was doing his bidding, but he was actually doing God’s. That is an important message we all need to hear. If you are in the middle of God’s plan for your life, no delay, inconvenience, or rescheduling is a surprise to God. It is all part of the plan.

Job 8:3, “Does God pervert justice? Does the Almighty pervert what is right?”

The Conclusion

It is easy to get caught up in our plans. Plan your work, work your plan. We get the illusion of being in control. God must break that illusion to bring us back to Him.

Obedience is our only responsibility, not the process or the results. We are to make ourselves available to God and use what He has given us. He will do what we can’t. I forget this at times, which leads to stress and anxiety. Neither is part of God’s plan for me.

Psalm 111:7, “The works of His hands are truth and justice; All His precepts are sure.”

Heroes vs. Survivors

Heroes vs SurvivorsHeroes vs. survivors. We don’t grow up wanting to be just survivors. I think most of us grow up wanting to be heroes because heroes are simple.

HEROES

Heroes leap over tall buildings. They rescue people from burning buildings. They charge into battle as swelling music plays behind them. Their victories are clear and decisive. The credits roll, and everyone knows who saved the day.

Real life rarely works that way.

Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

Real life is getting up when you don’t want to. It is going to work after receiving bad news. Real life is burying someone you love and still finding the strength to comfort others at the funeral. It is waking the next morning after a failure and paying the bills anyway. Real life is forgiving someone who never apologized. It is choosing not to become cruel even though life has given you every excuse. Real life is learning to trust again. It is carrying grief without letting it poison your ability to love.

Real life is survival with your emotions intact.

SURVIVAL

Philippians 4:13, “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”

That may be one of the hardest things a person can do. Survival, by itself, isn’t rare. Human beings are remarkably resilient. We can become numb, shut down, and harden ourselves until nothing gets in or out.

But surviving with your humanity intact is different. That is the difference between merely enduring and truly surviving.

Surviving is enduring suffering while remaining compassionate. It is knowing betrayal and still trusting. It means facing bitterness and still choosing hope. Survivors experience injustice and still believe in people’s worth.

That isn’t flashy. No action figures are made for that. No child dresses up for Halloween as “The Person Who Kept Showing Up Despite Their Grief.”

SCARS

Isaiah 55:8-9, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

And yet, those are the people who quietly hold the world together. They don’t say, “I lost.” They say, “It left scars.”

Scars are evidence of healing. They are not proof that nothing happened. They are proof that something happened and that you endured.

The ancient warrior people we admired were covered in scars. The difference is that we romanticize the scars we can see and overlook those carried in silence.

REAL HEROES

Isaiah 40:29, “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”

I have traveled thousands of miles to sit with struggling entrepreneurs. I’ve taught students who may never remember my name. I’ve written about pain not to display it but to help others navigate their own. I’ve continued to exercise, learn, serve, and hope, even while carrying losses I rarely describe in detail. That is life.

I know we resist the word “hero,” and I understand why. We associate it with exceptional people who do what ordinary people cannot.

But perhaps there is another definition. Maybe a hero isn’t someone who avoids fear. Maybe a hero is simply someone who refuses to surrender their humanity.

Someone who keeps showing up, absorbing hardship without passing it on.

Someone who says, “This pain stops with me.”

It is the person who can still laugh, still teach, still encourage, and still notice the person sitting alone in the corner after life has taken its swings.

You may never feel like an action figure. Most survivors don’t. They know too much about their failures, doubts, anger, exhaustion, and limitations to believe in the mythology.

But if I had to choose between following the invincible hero who has never bled and the scarred survivor who says, “I’ve been knocked down more than once. I don’t have all the answers, but I know you can take one more step because I’ve taken it myself,”

I CHOOSE

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

I would choose the survivor every time.

Because survivors don’t offer fantasy, they offer hope. Not the hope that life won’t wound us, but the hope that wounds don’t have the final word.

God Never Intended Us to Stay the Same

God never expects us to stay the same.God Never Intended for us to Stay the Same. Many Christians can point to the moment they accepted Christ. They remember the day, the place, and the circumstances. It marked the beginning of a relationship that changed their eternal future. Yet for many believers, that is where the story seems to stop.

Dallas Willard once described what he called “Vampire Christians.” These are people who want the benefits of Christ without becoming His disciples. They want forgiveness, not transformation. They want salvation, not surrender.

While the phrase may sound harsh, it raises an important question: Did God save us simply so we could go to Heaven one day, or is He trying to accomplish something in us now?

A Greater Purpose

The Bible points to a greater purpose. God is not merely preparing a place for us; He is preparing us for that place. His goal is to shape us into the likeness of Christ.

Romans 8:29 “to be conformed to the image of His Son.”

That means Christianity is not simply about what we believe. It is about who we are becoming.

This transformation begins when we learn the heart of Jesus.

Ezekiel 36:26, “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

When faced with everyday decisions, do we ask what Christ would do? Does our faith shape how we treat our families, conduct our business, respond to frustration, and serve our neighbors? Christianity was never meant to be practiced only on Sunday mornings. It is meant to shape every part of our lives.

Often God’s work in us comes through circumstances we would never choose for ourselves.

I asked for strength, and God gave me difficulties that required it. When I asked for wisdom, and He gave me problems to solve. If I asked for courage, and He placed me in situations that demanded it. I asked for love, and He brought hurting people into my path.

God’s gifts do not always arrive in attractive packaging.

Trials

James reminds us to view trials as opportunities for growth because they cultivate perseverance and maturity. The challenges we face are often the tools God uses to shape us into the people He created us to be.

James 1:2-4, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

Transformation is not something we accomplish alone. The Holy Spirit works within us to change our desires, guide our actions, and cultivate Christlike character. The fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—serves as evidence that God is actively at work in a person’s life.

2 Corinthians 3:17-18, “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.  And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”

The Holy Spirit also equips each believer with unique gifts. These gifts are not given for our benefit alone but to serve others and advance God’s purposes. Part of spiritual maturity is learning how God designed us and using those abilities faithfully to help those around us.

Like physical growth, spiritual growth requires participation.

A person does not become physically strong by owning gym equipment. Strength comes from regular exercise. Likewise, spiritual strength develops through regular practices that draw us closer to God.

Prayer, Scripture, silence, solitude, worship, and service are not religious obligations. They are exercises for the soul. Over time, they shape our thoughts, attitudes, and actions.

Goal

The goal is not perfection. The goal is progress.

Most meaningful change happens slowly. It results from thousands of small acts of obedience repeated over a lifetime. As habits form, old patterns lose their grip, and new ones begin to emerge.

God never intended us to remain as we were. He loves us enough to accept us where we are, but He loves us too much to leave us there.

The Christian life is not merely about arriving in Heaven someday. It is about becoming more like Christ today. Every challenge, every opportunity, and every act of obedience becomes part of God’s ongoing work of transformation.

The question is not whether God is working.

The question is whether we are willing to cooperate with what He is doing.

William Temple: “God’s purpose is to make us like Christ; God’s way is to fill us with His Spirit.”