Tag: Problems

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Getting in the Way of God

Getting in the way of God, what does that mean? This idea is a concept that I struggle with constantly. It started with a passage in Mark.

Mark 8:31–33, “He then began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law and that he must be killed and after three days rise again. He spoke plainly about this, and Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. But when Jesus turned and looked at his disciples, he rebuked Peter. “Get behind me, Satan!” he said. “You do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”

Jesus strongly rebukes Peter. What did Peter do to deserve this type of treatment? Peter put his desire and the world’s desires before God’s desire. He thought he had a better plan for saving his Jewish people. The problem was that Peter didn’t understand the right question. It was not saving the Israelites from the Romans but saving all humanity from destruction.

That took me back to the early 2000’s. We had a men’s retreat at my church. A recession was in progress, and some men were looking for jobs. After one man stood before the assembled men and asked for help in his job search, Leo Wells of Wells Real Estate Investment Trust, a relatively wealthy man, said not to get so involved in good works that you get in the way of God’s plans.

At the time, it struck me as a very unChrist-like statement. Should we not always do as much as we can with what we have to help another Christian?

1 John 3:17 ~ “If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?”

Getting in the Way

1 Corinthians 2:11, “For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so, no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God.”

It took time and perspective to understand what Leo was saying. I looked at the crisis in my life for direction. How many times did God use a crisis to get my attention? How often have I walked away from a crisis with a greater appreciation for the experience?

We hate crises, uncertainty, and vulnerability. For me, it was mainly about how it affected others. People depended on me, and I was vulnerable. I didn’t know how long this situation would last, how bad it would get, or how I would keep my commitments.

It is in these moments that we cling to Christ. Many times, it is the crisis that causes us to rest in Christ’s promise never to desert us. A crisis is the ultimate litmus test of our faith. It is not the blessings and good times; it is when we are weakest and most vulnerable.

Had well-meaning Christians interfered with what God was trying to accomplish with me during a crisis, I may not have learned the lesson He had for me. I can’t say I looked at it that way during my dark hours; I wanted help, relief, and certainty. I wanted to get as far from my problem as humanly possible; I didn’t care what that looked like.

How Do We Know

Jeremiah 32:19, “Great are your purposes and mighty are your deeds. Your eyes are open to the ways of all mankind; you reward each person according to their conduct and as their deeds deserve.”

I find that there are times when we experience the downside to wisdom. Ignorance is bliss. God opens our eyes to His wisdom, and our limited human existence freezes. We don’t know how to deal with it. God knows everything, and we know so little about our impact on the future. What is our response when presented with an opportunity to help someone out of a crisis?

There is only one viable response: PRAYER. Every situation is unique. Every path forward has its own story. There are times when we should step in and help. But we must be aware that there are times when we need to trust God a little bit more. There may be a purpose behind the situation that we do not see. The best worldly advice I can give is to see if God is not holding open another door that does not include us. Prayer is the only way you can decern this.

Job 42:2, “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted.”

Constantly, others present me with opportunities to help. It seems the opportunities are endless. I have tried to learn not to be impulsive. My kneejerk reaction is to do something. The correct answer is to pray about it. Let God do His thing. I hate to see people in pain, but sometimes, a little pain is precisely what God intends. I think about the long-term consequences of my help. Will it promote independence and growth, or will it foster dependency?

Leo’s Echo

It has been almost a quarter of a century, and that one statement by Leo haunts me. When do I play, and when do I sit on the sidelines? When am I helping with God’s plan for another, and when am I getting in the way? I have gained the wisdom to ask the question but not the wisdom to answer it. That is troubling.

1 John 2:6, “The one who says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same manner as He walked.”

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A Problem Without a Solution is a Fact

“If a problem has no solution, it may not be a problem but a fact, not to be solved, but to be coped with over time.” – Israeli Prime Minister Shimon Peres

Recognizing Facts and Moving Forward

Understanding that some issues are beyond resolution can be liberating. Consider the example of a parent who may not have provided the ideal level of support during your upbringing. This might have impacted your self-esteem or emotional growth. While this situation is unfortunate, it’s a fact of your past that cannot be altered. Instead of dwelling on the unchangeable, we can focus on how to move forward positively.

The Power of Perspective

How we handle problems differs significantly from how we accept facts. Problems can be dissected, analyzed, and tackled step-by-step. The future is open to influence and transformation. Conversely, some life circumstances are immutable, whether they stem from the past or exist in the present beyond our control.

1 Peter 3:9, “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.”

Problem-solving is part art and part skill. Some tried and true approaches help minimize the impact of problems. There are strategies for breaking a problem into manageable parts and solving each at a time. Sometimes, solving a problem requires playing a hunch or rolling the dice but in a predictable manner. The art must be grounded in skill. But how do we deal with a problem without a solution?

Navigating Unsolvable Problems

An insightful lesson from my college days comes to mind. I had a calculus professor who always put one problem on the test that did not have a solution. Although his responsibility was to teach us math, he also felt compelled to teach us about life. A student would flunk the test if they didn’t concede that some problems are unsolvable. They would spend all their time working on one equation that had no answer, leaving the other, solvable problems, unattended. Once students understood this, they were more careful about how they spent their time during the test. Now, the question is to decide which problems are complicated or unsolvable.

James 1:12, “Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.”
Accepting and Adapting to Facts

Many of us struggle to accept unpleasant facts, which can lead to frustration and wasted effort. Embracing reality allows us to redirect our energy towards meaningful pursuits. Acceptance paves the way for peace and purpose, freeing us from the burden of trying to change the unchangeable.

Romans 8:31, “What shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”
Creating a Positive Path Forward

A problem without a solution becomes a fact, and accepting it is the first step towards progress. We must forgive past transgressions, whether ours or others’, and focus on what we can influence. For instance, dealing with different personality types isn’t about changing others but adjusting our approach to create productive interactions.

1 Peter 3:8, “Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.”
Living with Compassion and Faith

Compassion can transform relationships and situations. Slowing down, being humble, and accepting solutions beyond our control can lead to extraordinary outcomes. Trusting in Christ and embodying His love helps alleviate stress and anxiety, leading to smoother paths in life.

Romans 12:2, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what the will of God is, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Trusting in Divine Guidance

Recognizing that God’s love can overcome all obstacles is empowering. Many of life’s challenges are, in fact, unchangeable, and we must turn these over to God. Instead of struggling against the inevitable, we can seek guidance, patience, and a way forward through faith.

John 8:36, “So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.”

By embracing facts and focusing on what we can influence, we open ourselves to a life filled with peace, purpose, and the transformative power of faith.

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Why it Happens or What Do I Do Next?

When faced with a difficult situation, do you ask why it happens or what do I do next? Why something happened is grounded in the past.  It is passive in that you can not change the past. It is blame-oriented. What you want me to do next is grounded in the future. It is active in that it requires me to do something to change the future; it is forgiveness-oriented. 

“You may be wondering why such difficulty has come into your life. However, the greater question is, “Lord, how do You plan to use this difficulty so I may serve You better?” ― Charles F. Stanley, How to Let God Solve Your Problems: 12 Keys for Finding Clear Guidance in Life’s Trials.

Proverbs 26:24 “Enemies disguise themselves with their lips, but in their hearts they harbor deceit.”

Why It Happens?

What to choose, why it happens, or what do I do next? Most people I know gravitate to why something is happening in their life. They want to know who said what, who did what, and who is responsible. Somehow, understanding who is at fault makes it more understandable. Unfortunately, that is not usually true; debating the past shrouds the present. The he said, she said, they said interrogation only leads to hurt feelings and a defensive posture. People do not remember exact words or actions. Personal bias taints repeated conversations; we remember what we want to hear. The discussion is personal.

Matthew 7:3-5, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

If we ignore the mistakes from the past, we will likely repeat them. However, learning from the past is all about making a better future. It’s about figuring out what we want and how to get there. What happened in the past doesn’t matter as much as what we should do in the future. To understand and solve a problem, we first must admit there’s a problem. Instead of blaming, it’s more important to focus on finding a good solution to prevent the same problem from happening again.

Proverbs 18:17, “Any story sounds true until someone tells the other side and sets the record straight.”

What Do I Do Next?

Let me give you an example of why it happens or what do I do next collide. I was at a board meeting where one party thought we had overspent the budget; another party understood we had a surplus. Rather than accepting the problem that we had two different perceptions, the discussion went toward who did what wrong. This conversation went on for over a week via text and email. At no point did the discussion turn to what do we do in the future to avoid this happening again. Can we create one set of financials that is acceptable to everyone? It was more important to understand who was right and who was wrong. Egos became bruised, reputations were tainted, and relationships got strained.

Christ wasn’t that way. He didn’t quiz people on the situation that gave way to sin. He accepted that sin had happened; the question was what to do next. You didn’t read that Jesus reconciled relationships by allocating blame. His focus was on the desired state and how to achieve it. He told people what they had to do for salvation. Christ has forgiven the past.

What About People Problems?

What if the problem is that two people don’t like each other? Listening to them complain will not help get to the root cause of the problem. Asking each one what they would ultimately like to see to resolve the problem would be a better approach. Getting to the root cause is far more productive than listening to two people gossip and slander each other. Getting to the root cause requires getting the parties to get off their emotions and on to a more objective conversation.

This sometimes creates a paradox concerning why it happens or what do I do next.

Regarding personalities, it sometimes means that the solution is to help one of them find another path. Toxic personalities that do not seek positive change are unsuitable for any relationship. But they still deserve grace. You must use compassion and love when you pursue a solution.

Romans 12:14-21, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: ‘If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink’… Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

Desired State

“All adversity, every problem you face, is a gift of love given to you from the hand of God.” ― Charles F. Stanley, How to Let God Solve Your Problems: 12 Keys for Finding Clear Guidance in Life’s Trials.

Ultimately, good problem-solving relies on God’s guidance. It is trusting that God knows everything, cares about everything, and is not surprised by anything. You can not change the past; the future is malleable; it has many possibilities. God desires that we not live in the past but look forward to the future.

People all have baggage, flaws, and biases. Much of what people say at the moment is a product of something in the past. Previous conversations or events bleed over to current situations. Even our childhood experience raises their ugly head from time to time. We can not rely on what is said to determine what is wrong accurately. The root of the problem may not have anything to do with the situation. God would want us to set aside our need to be heard to focus on His need for us to show compassion and grace. When faced with conflict or disappointment, ask yourself, “Lord, what do you want me to do next?”

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Living a Life That Inspires

There are leaders and those that lead. Leaders hold positions of power; those that lead inspire.

There is no louder voice in your life than your character’s voice; it is the drumbeat that announces the consistency of your actions over time. I have seen people of character make incredible decisions of great sacrifice without saying a word. They just did what was right because it was right; nothing more. It cost them a lot, but not as much as it would have cost to live otherwise.

Luke 8:17, “For nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that will not be known and come to light.”

As we strive to become the person God made us be, we must face hard choices. It is the hard choices that define our character. The easy stuff anyone can do. To temper steel, it has to be super-heated. Steel is tempered to achieve greater toughness by decreasing the hardness. We must be tested in the heat of life to perfect our toughness by reducing our hardness. We are to reflect hope by discarding our bitterness; humility by turning our back on self-centeredness.

1 Corinthians 3:13, “each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work.”

I’m reminded of a story in John chapter nine. It is the story of Jesus helping the blind man see. The disciples ask Jesus whose fault it was that the man was blind; was he or his parents? Jesus replied that it was through his blindness that others would see God.

John 9:1-4, “As He (Jesus) passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And his disciples asked Him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.”

The people in our sphere of influence watch how we live and draw conclusions concerning our character. It is easy to display a positive persona when things are going right, and all is good in the world. The critical test is what do we look like when things are not so good? Do we still exhibit trust in Christ? Do we still project hope and reassurance when everyone knows our life sucks?

As much as I  would prefer it was different, I now look at challenges as opportunities to show others my faith. When I am in a  dark place, I need to let Jesus’ light radiate through me. This opportunity is the very moment of truth that God can use to spread the Gospel.

Ephesians 5:13, “But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.”

Very few people live to be tested. Most are like me; try me if you must, but make it either multiple choice or fill in the blank. I dread the heart wrenching tests, like losing a loved one, cancer, or job changes. But I know those will take supernatural powers that I don’t have. The test that catches me off guard is the pop quizzes; you know, deception, anger, or jealousy. So many times, I fail those because I didn’t prepare for them. The big test I cram for; I pray, read scripture, and seek a Christian council. The pop quizzes find me lacking. The bible would say a lamp without oil.

It is natural to focus inwardly in times of peril. It is important to remember of the many people in your sphere of influence whose eternity might rest on what you do next. God has created you for moments just like this. The God that spoke the universe into existence loves you and will not set you up for failure. God’s testing is not to find you lacking but to display His power through you.

Paul concludes his letter from prison to the Colossians by asking them to pray, not for his release from prison, but that God may open the door for the message so that he may proclaim the mystery of Christ. He asked that they pray that he may make the most of the opportunity and that his speech be gracious, seasoned with salt.

Colossians 4: 3-6, “At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison— that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak. Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”

Live to inspire. Let your light shine brightest when darkness comes.

1 Peter 1:7, “so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ,”

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