Living with Purpose

Proverbs 16:1, “All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the LORD.”

The Setup

I write about things with which I struggle. God has blessed me. It is so obvious and blatant that I would be a fool to try to hide it. Along the way I have made terrible decisions. I have run and hid and lied to avoid accountability. I have let my ego and my selfishness direct my steps. All of this to say: I’m human.

Because I live in this diametric world where I am blessed and simultaneously rebellious, God having a plan for me that perpetuates God’s kingdom on earth seems ludicrous. I have strong Christian friends that are so wholly convinced of the assurance of their salvation that they think I am simple-minded. Assurance is: certainty about something or a positive declaration intended to give confidence; a promise. Christ gives us assurance, not a guarantee.

They feel I am complicating the process of sanctification, and they may be right.

Now I am neither seminary-trained, nor do I want to be perceived as having answers, so I want you to know this is a personal concern for me. I read the series of passages below and can’t help but think: I have a role in my sanctification. I cannot save myself, but I can deceive myself into believing I’m saved.

Ephesians 2:8-9, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast”

James 2:17,” Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.”

Matthew 7:22-23, “On that day, many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, didn’t we prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many powerful deeds in your name?’ Then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you. Go away from me, you lawbreakers.”

Matthew 22:37-38, “And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

These verses paint a picture for me that it is through grace I am save by the blood of Christ, but it has to move from head knowledge (consciousness, reasoning, logic, habits, skills, values) to heart knowledge (spirit, surrender, trust, brokenness, character), and the outward display of that transformation will be a change in behavior driven by love.

The Caveat

There are no hidden clauses in the Bible. God is very straight forward. Salvation is too important to play games with. If you have to “interpret” a verse, maybe you are reading too much into it or crafting it to your desires. Here are some examples of “IF” statements that God uses to clarify our sanctification.

Matthew 6:14-15, “Jesus said: “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

John 14:15, “Jesus said: “If you love me, you will obey what I command.”

1 Corinthians 15:2, “By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain.”

Genesis 4:7, “If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it.”

Exodus 19:5a, “Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant, then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession.”

Deuteronomy 6:25, “And if we are careful to obey all this law before the LORD our God, as he has commanded us, that will be our righteousness.”

Isaiah 48:18, “If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea.”

John 15:14, “Jesus said: “You are my friends if you do what I command.”

The Delivery

The struggle I am dealing with is not what I do, but why I do it. God has a plan for me; we know that from scripture. I can accept that and mechanically work through the process. But if I sleepwalk through his purpose, I miss the point.

I am reasonably adept at teaching micro-enterprise development, I know how to write and review business plans, and I can evaluate opportunities. All of this is mechanics. It is head knowledge enhanced with experience. It is not what God wants me to do. It is a tool he wants me to use. What he wants me to do is love the lost.

Loving the lost is different; it’s complicated. Not because I perceive the lost are not worthy of love. It is because I don’t know them, I don’t have a relationship with them. They are strangers. For some people loving others, having compassion for them, and being able to show empathy comes easy. I am not one of them.

God built me to be goal-driven. You set a point on the horizon, and then you drive toward it. All ships rise on the same tide. I believe in pragmatically helping people. I believe in giving them fish until they are strong enough to fish for themselves.

Reread Matthew 22:37-38 above; it defines the point on the horizon we are to drive towards.

The Payoff

Ephesians 1:18, “I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened so that you will know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints.”

God does an amazing thing when I step out in faith: He gives me a new heart. It is incredible. A stranger can approach me, and I sense their need, not their physical need, it’s deeper than that. There is a draw to them. There is a neediness about them that they can’t hide with small talk and witty sarcasm. It makes me want to know them better. It’s an exciting experience. To experience this, I have to have the guts to step out of my shell and speak to them.

Ali Baba used “Khulja simsim” to open the cave of the 40 thieves. God used “Can I help you?” to open the door to my heart. As they talk and I listen, God works on both of us. I find these conversations the most stimulating conversation I ever have. These are wonderful people who are in an unfortunate position not unlike my own.

It’s always about people. 

This post takes you a long way around the block to say: pay attention to the real purpose, not just the tools God puts in your life to achieve the purpose. Don’t deceive yourself and, in doing so, jeopardize your salvation. It’s not about activity.

The Life of a Tent Maker

Paul was a tent-maker. That was his day job; it sustained his ministry.

Acts 18:3, “and because he was of the same trade, he stayed with them and they were working, for by trade, they were tent-makers . “

Paul continued to pursue his vocation as a tent-maker throughout his life. Including the time Paul was an enforcer for the Sanhedrin, and after his conversion. We can assume he was reasonably good at it. But being good at something and having a passion for something are two different issues completely.

We mistake being good at something for being passionate about that same thing. After all to be good at something you need to practice it, you need to study it, you need to stay at it for a while. Why would someone put that much effort into a dispassionate endeavor? There are a lot of reasons. You could deem that your material life would be better off if you had this particular vocation. You might feel more accepted in your social circle if you had a specific skill. For some children, their parents ingrain in them the idea that they should have a particular profession or vocation when they grow up, so they chase it to make our parents happy.

In America, what I see more often than not, is that we come out of school and need to earn a living. We don’t know what is out there, so we take the available job. We might do some high-level filtering like; I like talking to people, or I don’t like working with numbers. But for the most part, we need to pay the rent. That starts a vicious cycle of more bills, more money, more obligations, more money. We become good at something because it meets this basic need.

But the vocation that Paul was good at was not his passion. When asked who he was, he would not have answered “tent maker”.

1 Corinthians 16-17, “For when I preach the Gospel, I cannot boast, since I am compelled to preach. Woe to me if I do not preach the Gospel! If I preach voluntarily, I have a reward; if not voluntarily, I am simply discharging the trust committed to me.”

Paul lays out his passion for preaching the word. He was compelled to preach. Paul had a firm grasp on his calling and love, and it wasn’t tent-making.

As we look toward the future to try to understand God’s plan for our life, we need to take a lesson from Paul. Our vocation might be an essential element in God’s plan for us, as it provides sustainability in our ministry. We might not need or want to walk away from our “day job” when we transition closer to God’s plan. It may not be our passion, but it may be part of the program. It is a skill and a resource God gave to us to use for His purpose. 

Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the LORD, not for human masters.”

I need to make a point here; Paul did believe that those who share the Gospel could receive compensation. If full-time ministry is your calling, then God will find a way for you to monetize (earn a living from) it. Here is what Paul says:

1 Corinthians 9:11 “If we have sown spiritual things among you, is it too much if we reap material things from you?”

1 Corinthians 9:14, “the Lord commanded that those who proclaim the gospel should get their living by the Gospel.”

Galatians 6:6 “One who is taught the word must share all good things with the one who teaches.”

Sustainability is important. If what you are chasing is truly God’s plan for you, He will provide the resources. From experience, I should remind you, the present using the past to create the future, remember that? The season of your life might change. Don’t view that as a lack of sustainability. Look at it as the cost of tuition.

I need you to find me

1 Peter 1:8-9 “You have not seen him, but you love him. You do not see him now, but you believe in him, and so you rejoice with an indescribable and glorious joy because you are attaining the goal of your faith—the salvation of your souls.”

Things come to me from odd places. I was watching the movie “Find Me.”, I gravitated to it because it was about hiking. It’s a love story, I’m a guy I know, don’t judge me. I won’t ruin the storyline, but a statement struck me, “I need you to find me.” It was like a lost little voice from within. It had a hint of desperation. It was the voice of the man that God wanted me to be. It was a plea. It was lost and wanted to be found.

I never really thought that the life I was looking for was waiting to be found. The visual of this is hard for me to describe. I see a great love lost in a dark forest of discouragement. The trees of disappointment and lost dreams are blocking out the sun. This great love forages for food and stays warm at night by the campfire while I bask in the sun. God made me this man of great passion and achievement, and I have sequestered him in the recesses of my mind.

See, the problem is that he is not practical. He has great plans and great enthusiasm for things he cannot be. He doesn’t worry about the bills or going to work. He cares little for the aggravation of traffic or the passing of time. He speaks of adventure. He speaks of usefulness without compensation. He wants me to believe that I can exist in a world of joy and fulfillment, and God will provide.

He is real. He is in my mind, pushed down by life.

Proverbs 10:28 “The prospect of the righteous is joy, but the hopes of the wicked come to nothing.”

The reality is the picture is painted backward. It is I who live in the forest of discouragement. The man that God wants me to be lives in a world of light. The trees of my forest are bills and jobs and traffic. I have come to believe that being the person God wants me to be is the struggle and living life, is natural and more uncomplicated. This view of life is not valid. Each has its struggles, but only one has eternal rewards. God admonishes us in Luke 11:35, “Then watch out that the light in you is not darkness.”

1 John 1:5-6 “Now this is the gospel message we have heard from him and announce to you: God is light, and in him there is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him and yet keep on walking in the darkness, we are lying and not practicing the truth.”

As I struggle to find my way, it is encouraging to know that I am not alone. Through the Holy Spirit embedded in me, I have a guide. I do not have to pull the real me out of darkness; I need to walk toward the light.

When lost in the darkness of the world, always walk east toward the horizon and sunrise will come.

Ephesians 5:8-9 “for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth).”

If you want a better story, give the pen to a better author.

Proverbs 16:9, “We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.”

I was thinking about the New Year. What was the message I wanted to give myself about how to proceed? Man, I thought of the processes I’ve used in the past to both identify areas of improvement and to correct them. I questioned what needed improvement versus what would be nice to improve. What had kingdom impact and what had earthly impact? We all have limited resources. The most precious resource God has given us is time. Waste time and you can never get it back. Time isn’t the only resource you need if you are going to implement lasting change. It may not even be the critical path. How do I focus my effort in 2020?

Paul Bickford, the Youth Pastor at Fellowship Bible Church in Roswell, GA, started his sermon with this scripture:

Psalms 139:13-16,

Certainly, you made my mind and heart; you wove me together in my mother’s womb.

I will give you thanks because your deeds are awesome and amazing. You knew me thoroughly;

my bones were not hidden from you, when I was made in secret and sewed together in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw me when I was inside the womb. All the days ordained for me were recorded in your scroll before one of them came into existence.”

This scripture refocused my thinking. Instead of trying to “fix” me, maybe I should just try to be who God made me? I’ve always, mostly, attempted to focus on who God made me, but somehow it still got back to what I could or should do to get there. I focus so much on my faults and short-comings, that I lose track of the goal. The goal never was to be perfect. I shouldn’t focus my energy on being flawless, which leads to stress and discontentment.  I believe it is one of the primary reasons people do not keep their New Years’ resolutions. When you focus on one flaw, you start seeing all of them, it becomes disheartening.

Reread the scripture above. “Certainly, you made my mind and heart;” God made me intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. Every detail of who I am he specifically created. “You knew me thoroughly;” Knowing me is more than seeing me or touching me. It is intimate knowledge of my hopes, and fears, and dreams. He knows why I yearn for something even when I don’t know. He knows why I have a passion for certain things and have no interest in others. My perceive flaws are not things that are wrong with me, but a focus on the wrong issues.

Let me see if I can give you an example from my life. As I age, staying in any reasonable physical shape becomes incredibly elusive. Every day that I live, my physiological capacity decreases. It is a slight decrease on a daily or weekly basis, but it is there. Taking a couple of weeks off will mean several weeks of catching up. It is endless and exhausting. Why do I do it? I don’t have a fixation of conditioning. I do have an obsession for living my purpose. I need to be in the physical shape required to live on purpose. If I exercised out of vanity, I’d quit. That train has left the station. The body will fade, but the Kingdom’s impact lasts for eternity. As long as I get up in the morning, God has a purpose for me to accomplish. As long as God finds me useful, I need to be prepared to respond.

Psalm 39:4-5, “LORD, make me to know my end And what is the extent of my days; Let me know how transient I am. “Behold, You have made my days as handbreadths, And my lifetime as nothing in Your sight; Surely every man at his best is a mere breath.”

As you think about things you want to change about yourself in 2020, think about why. Are you trying to improve a perceived flaw, or does it have an actual Kingdom impact? A good friend, Patti Gordon of Deepwater Women, has a tag line on her email that says, “Chase what matters.” Are you going to spend 2020 working what matters, or are you going to waste another year shoring up the facade of a crumbling building?

Isaiah 51:6, “Lift up your eyes to the sky, Then look to the earth beneath; For the sky will vanish like smoke, And the earth will wear out like a garment And its inhabitants will die in like manner; But My salvation will be forever, And My righteousness will not wane.”

Sharing the Richness of our Lives

Colossians 3:15 “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”

This is the time of the year when we become introspective. Thanksgiving allows us to think of all of the things for which we are thankful. Christmas is the backdrop for showing love and appreciation. For all who have touched our lives and those we do not know but feel compassion for their plight. New Year’s follows Christmas, a time of renewal. We commit to being a better version of ourselves. We are thankful, appreciative, and fortunate — not all of us.

This rejuvenation brings to light one of my rocks. It is a story bringing my attention to the importance of dwelling on the richness of my life. It reminds me of how important it was sharing that richness with others.

Atlanta has a spring art festival in Piedmont Park. It is a spectacular event both for its content and its setting. The Dogwood Art Festival is in the spring when the dogwoods are in full bloom. Although it runs the entire weekend, I go down early Friday. I like that time; I can talk with the artist as they set up their booths before the crowds arrive. These folks are incredibly skilled. They have an absolute passion for what they do. This passion is reflected both in the quality of their work and the prices they charge. The Dogwood Art Festival is not a mom and pop affair.

This particular year the weather was incredible. Azure blue skies, cumulus clouds that remind you of cotton candy. The gorgeous white and pink dogwoods in full bloom. The temperature was almost non-existent, feeling neither cold or warm, absolutely picturesque. The vendors were excited to show their creations. It was a joy to be alive.

After I had spent some time walking around, I settled comfortably on a picnic bench, not far from vendor row, to watch people. I like watching people. It fills me with curiosity. I was also growing hungry and trying to decide what cardiac inducing meal I was going to eat. It is apparently in the by-laws of art festivals management that healthy food was taboo.

A woman sat down on the bench across that table from me. She was late middle age, conservatively dressed, unremarkable in many ways. The kind of person you might see in a crowd without ever really seeing her, that perfect blend of human camouflage. She said, “I could live a year on the price of one of these things.” Without looking, I agreed.

Psalm 9:1, “I will give thanks to you, LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.”

God has this incredible way of introducing me to the exact person with whom He wants me to engage. One thing led to another, and we started talking. I bought her lunch. One great lady, she was living in a half-way house after being released from prison. Life had been long and hard and disappointing. That once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that could have taken her life in a different direction was always just outside her reach. The hurdle in her life was guys. They came into her life at the wrong time with mischievous intent.

There was a determination and grit in her outlook. She had a vision, but no plan to get there. It wasn’t a grand vision. It was a vision to become normal. You know, 40-hour workweek, home, friends and maybe family. Everyone has a unicorn; this was hers. If anything, I am a guy with a plan. Our meeting wasn’t serendipity or coincidence; it was part of God’s plan for her.

We started talking about God’s plan for her life. God’s plan was for her to prosper. But she had to be willing to surrender her plan for His. He would be faithful in His promise if she would. The first step was to find a church that had good scripture-based teaching. Then she needed to join an accountability group within that church that she could trust. We talked for about 90 minutes. She was positive, engaged, and asked questions.

The transformation I saw was that she sat more upright. Her face softened. Her eyes were brighter, more focused. She stated that she knew her plan didn’t work. She had heard the message of Christ in prison. It was something she felt she needed to look into further, but she always put it off. She knew of a church that had members she knew. They came by the half-way house. She liked them; they weren’t pushy.

Others plowed the field and planted the seeds in her life; I was fertilizer (be nice; it’s a metaphor). The harvest will come.

1 Corinthians 9:10 “Surely he says this for us, doesn’t he? Yes, this was written for us, because whoever plows and threshes should be able to do so in the hope of sharing in the harvest.”

Did she find her unicorn? I don’t know. I do know that God wants me to not only be obedient for the sake of others, but to share the bounty of His love for me with them.

It may seem Strange, but it is Quite Amazing

Every once in awhile, I think about how I got here. Not the incredible odds of being born in one of the most abundant countries on the face of the earth. How did I get here, where I am sitting right now? It may seem a strange thought, but it is quite amazing.

 In 1966 I was a sixteen-year-old high school student living in Marseilles, a very small Midwest town. I was not extraordinary in any sense of the word. I spent very little time thinking about my future, that is the future after high school. I had a lot of thoughts about high school. I knew about jobs; I had already had a few of those. The concept of a career was foreign. So how did that kid, end up here?

 If you had told me that I not only would graduate from college, but I would do it more than once. I would have told you I’m not bright enough for that. How about travel? Not only will you leave Marseilles and the state, but you will also leave the country. You will log over 3 million miles on airlines alone, covering six continents. Before it is over, you will have hundreds of people reporting to you. You will work for big companies and even start some of your own.

You will never live in Marseilles again. I would have been terrified and sadden, that last part especially. It was my world, and to this day, my home. To even write it forty years later, saddens me. 

 God sent me on a journey. Although I felt in control most of my life, I wasn’t. Oh, I could make decisions. I could choose not to do what was best for me, and believe me; I did at times. But interestingly, all that wandering in the wilderness still brought me to right here.

Job 12:24, “He deprives of intelligence the chiefs of the earth’s people And makes them wander in a pathless waste.”

Volume One: “The Pagan Era”

There are three volumes to the book of my life. The first is “The Pagan Era.” Although I was baptized around nine years old at the Marseilles Baptist Church, I don’t think it took. The first third of my life was covered by doing the thing in front of me. It got me through adolescence into young adulthood. God was there, someone had to have created all of this, but after He finished, he was done. He wasn’t a micromanager. He put it all in play and then sat back and watched. How else could you explain all the dysfunctionality in the world?

 Volume Two: “The Age of Enlightenment”

1 Corinthians 1:27, “but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong,”

Volume One ended with a divorce and a pacemaker, a stone in my memorial. We experience the natural repercussion of our actions. Now is the start of Volume Two, I call “The Age of Enlightenment.” I turned back to my roots. I started to read the Bible. I didn’t go to church at this time. Church people seemed hypocritical in their approach to others outside the church. They always seemed to know what was best for everyone else.

 The revelation was that the Bible made sense at a very practical level. God created us to function in a given way. The Bible laid that out nicely. I started to see that if I could be a perfect version of myself, my life would improve. It might not improve materially, because my life was pretty good materially, I would improve emotionally. My life was an emotional desert. With all of my worldly success, I felt alone and anxious. There still was a void where my passion should have been. I wasn’t living for anything in particular. I just was. 

 The image I have of my life at this point comes from a science fiction movie. The astronaut escapes from his rapidly disintegrating ship. His capsule is thrust out into the vast black void of outer space; it is endless and ominous. He is alive with limited life support and no destination. Drifting aimlessly until it all ends. 

I came  to the understanding that God loved me intimately. So much so, that He died on the cross for my sins. He wanted a personal relationship with me. But to what end?

 After reading the Bible through every year for several years, I decided I needed another point of view. I started going to church. I went to several of them until I found a Bible teaching, non-denominational church that I enjoyed. They taught directly out of the Bible, no condemnation, just truth. Some of that truth was hard to swallow, but I was here to learn. September 11 put a temporary end to my travels, so I joined a local Bible study geared to the technology industry.

Volume Three “The Age of Truth”

 1 John 3:17, “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?”

Interaction with other Christians breathed life into my existence. This started Volume Three, “The Age of Truth”. Henri Poincare said, “Science is facts; just as houses are made of stones, so is science made of facts; but a pile of stones is not a house, and a collection of facts is not necessarily science.” This idea is my spiritual revelation. My head was full of facts, but that didn’t make me a Christian. It made me a good guy with good intentions. 

 For the very first time in my life, I understood it was never about me. Everything I had, have, or will have, is to be shared with others. My job, my time, my money all belonged to God for His use. I could never be good enough to earn my reward. I should then spend the rest of my life rewarding others.

 Serving others was insanely freeing. There was a purpose. It was surprising how quickly I embraced this idea. There was an explosion in my consciousness. All of a sudden, I got it. 

 At one point, I gave away everything, and I do mean everything. It became one of the stones in my memorial. I would not recommend it without intense prayer and competent counsel. It is a big ask, and God reserves it for the most important of assignments. I just happen to have one. God rewarded me with a sense of incredible peace. He has also done a great job of restoring me. It wasn’t just a stone; it has become my Gibraltar. 

We are all on a journey. The question is, “Where are you going?” God knows the answer if you will allow Him to direct your steps. My experience is; that it is freeing at a level that few experience. To be “Christ Like” is our purpose, our passion is how we live our purpose.

Galatians 6:2, “Bear one another burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

A Biblical Perspective of Planning

I am a plan your work, work your plan type of guy. The value of planning was instilled into me through success and failure. Success frequently followed a well thought out plan, and failure is the natural destination of poor planning. Unmitigated disaster is the contemporary of no planning. You will find the two of them huddled together in a cardboard box under the overpass.

I start every worthwhile endeavor with a written plan. Peter Drucker was famous for saying, “If you can’t measure it, you can’t improve it.” A well-written plan is a foundation for change management. Drucker’s statement is a well held secular view, but what about scripture? What does scripture say about planning? The Bible does talk about preparation. Proverbs, in particular, is full of advice on planning.

Proverbs 15:22, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed.”

Proverbs 16:3, “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”

Proverbs 16:9, “The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.”

Luke adds to this in Luke 14:28, “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?”

First Comes Prayer

Prayer is the first critical step in building a plan. The reason for this is because God already has a plan; we are trying to discover it. A well-known and often quoted verse from Jeremiah states (Jeremiah 29:11), “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” It is there for the discovering. We need to be cautious of getting too cute with our ideas. The Bible also warns us against relying too much on our cleverness.

Proverbs 23:4, “Do not wear yourself out to get rich; do not trust your own cleverness.”

Why? Because God is the author of all things. His view of time and space is dramatically different than ours. He understands the ripple effect of our actions throughout eternity. Here is what He says about His view of the future (Isaiah 55:8), “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.” What does God say about our knowledge of the future? Proverb 27:1, “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.” We know nada, zip, zilch about tomorrow. We write elaborate mathematical models and consult historical trends, but in the end, forecasting the future is an educated guess at best. God has already seen the future.

A Plan is Essential but Imperfect

James 4:13-14 “Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.”

Think of a plan as not a static document, but a journal. It demonstrates and illuminates our thinking. Demonstrates because we document why we thought what we thought. It illuminates by shining a light on both the good and bad of our logic. We start with what we believe to be accurate, and then we modify it as God enlightens us. It gives us a chance to look back at how our thinking has changed. Did we keep the ideas and insights that were good, did we discard poor or inadequate thinking?

One of my experiences is that some people take a great deal of time and effort to create a very workable plan. Then they stick it in a drawer and never look at it again. It was an intellectual exercise with no real meaning. Down the road, when they do not meet expectations, they have lost the guidepost that would have told them to make corrections.

My Conclusion

Having a plan is essential. Discovering the source of that plan is critical. Our goal is not to create a vision of our future. It is to realize the future that God has already created. The plan is the foundation of God’s will in our life. As the seasons of our life change, God will reveal more of His vision for us. As we see more, we can make adjustments to the plan. But to go through life without a plan is folly. Even a poorly written plan is better than no plan.

As we chase our purpose, we need to document our progress so that we can determine what we know and what we need to find out.

Mark 11:24, “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”

The Heart Wants What the Heart Wants

A hard concession to make to myself, as a man, is that love innervates me. Guys are supposed to be more aloof. My father, a great man, instilled in me the identity of a warrior. Not the brawling, fisticuff type of ruffian. But a man with a plan and the tenacity to see it through. That tenacity tended to create silos of emotion. It was a learned skill of compartmentalizing distractions. It was a way to cut through the clutter with a laser focus on achieving a goal. It was about making hard decisions. Winning was beating my ability and expectation. It conjures an image of always moving toward the fight, the fight being an obstacle, or an obstruction, or a challenge.

Somewhere my heart changed. The fight in me grew weary. I started to see the beauty in all of God’s creations. The outdoors that I loved morphed from a place to become physically stronger, to a place to experience creation. It was awe-inspiring, and at times emotionally overwhelming, to see what God had done. It started with the beauty of nature and slowly took over my being.

Colossians 3:14 “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

Love binds everything, all our virtues, all our passion, and all of our effort into an unstoppable force for God’s kingdom. If what we are searching for is not rooted in love, then we need to hit the pause button. Paul wrote this eloquent passage to the Corinthians concerning the power of love.

1 Corinthians 13

“1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient; love is kind. It does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now, we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.

You can’t fake it. People will see right through you if you try. You can not seem all loving and caring one moment and distant and cold the next. Your purpose is not just an activity that helps others. It has to be life-changing for both of you. “But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.” The echo that remains is love. The feeling of having loved and being loved is the most potent drug I know.

They say your eyes are the window of your soul. The other day I was listening to a speaker at a conference. The first part of the presentation was more how-to and why. The second part was how to apply the learning. There was an astounding transformation of the speaker between the first and second parts.  Her entire body language changed; her tone became softer. She became more relaxed and focused on the audience. Her body tilted toward them as she spoke of life-changing answered prayer. She connected with the people in the room. She had compassion for those who had not experienced what God can honestly do through prayer. It wasn’t just a passion for the topic; it was a love for the audience. She wanted good things for each of them.

1 John 4:19, “We love because He first loved us.”

When you make this connection, you will know God’s passion and purpose for you in life. When you drive toward using your God-given resources to help people experience the love and joy of knowing Christ, then you know you are on the right road. It is not enough that you can be successful in your chosen field; you have to want to be transformational. That is the purpose.

1 Corinthians 2:9 “However, as it is written: What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived — the things God has prepared for those who love him.”

What are the characteristics of a great purpose?

There are a few things I can think of off the top of my head that has helped me ferret through the clutter surrounding my purpose. Your list might be longer.

1 Peter 4:10 “As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.”

It is an extension of my past: I keep talking about “Each current season using the last season to build toward the next season.” I believe it is the building block of everything God has in mind for us. We are never done changing. God is always stretching us in ways we sometimes don’t expect. I believe with each move, God does not discard our past experiences but uses them to create new experiences. To not leverage the past is to waste valuable knowledge. If what I want to do next does not apply at least some of my past experiences, then I need to question my decision. 

I especially believe this is true with our darker experiences. It is at those times when things didn’t go as planned or even worse. These are the roots of compassion. These are the experiences that allow us to relate to others. The most influential and most relatable outreaches I have known were the result of past trauma. People who say, “God brought me through this and, God will do the same for you.”. 

James 1:17 “Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.”

I have the right experience: I am all for learning. Learning should be a lifelong endeavor. We should be continually evolving. I believe our purpose will dovetail nicely with the experiences and knowledge we already possess. There will be new skills and new knowledge, but they will be growth on our existing base. 

If what I am thinking about doing requires me to do things that I know I don’t like or know I have trouble doing, then I won’t be happy long. Sacrifice is a good thing, but the constant sacrifice is suffocating. How can we joyfully serve others if we are struggling just doing the everyday tasks? 

Romans 11:29 “for the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.”

It is the right time: There is a saying, “timing is everything.” I believe that is true with your ultimate calling. God will spend a great deal of time grooming you for what He has in store. He will help you develop new skills, meet the right people, expose you to new environments, and instill in you a longing for change. Only when the time is right will He nudge you into action. If you feel that your decision is forced or premature, it might be because it is. 

A caveat to this is that you can not let fear hold you back. I believe you will know the difference between homeostasis and lousy timing. Homeostasis is a natural desire to resist change. We all deal with it. God will give us the longing for change that will help us overcome this. Bad timing is another issue. Is God giving you discomfort that says, “This is the right thing, but the wrong time.”?

I’m qualified: There is a lot to this. We typically think of hard skills when it comes to qualification. It is always preferable to have the necessary hard skills before embarking on a new direction. But it is not the highest requirement. We learn hard skills. If you do not have all of them, do you at least have most of them? Do you have both the aptitude and passion for learning what you don’t have?

Soft Skills are a different matter. Mostly these make us, us. We like numbers versus words. We prefer to be alone rather than with a group. We obsess over details, or we are comfortable with averages. We want to interact directly with others to spread the gospel, or we want to enable others to do that task. Do we prefer to lead, or do we prefer someone else takes on the burden? Your soft skills have to be in line with your calling. If you push yourself for too long outside of your natural comfort zone, you will burn out. No one can be someone else for an extended time. 

1 Corinthians 12:4 “Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit.”

It is fun and exciting: Life is too short not to have fun. God would never give us a purpose for which we do not feel a genuine passion. I should ask myself, “If I did this for the rest of my life, would it make me happy?”

It is hard to find: Let’s face it, folks, we’re looking for a Unicorn. The great news is that God created a Unicorn just for you. It’s out there. For me, the hardest part is personal honesty. I get this idea in my head of what my purpose should look like, and then I force-feed my answers to fit the concept. It is harder for me to let the answers dictate the direction. Sometimes the answers are not there. When it comes down to it, I don’t know myself well enough. That is when I have to ask others who know me well. What they see in me might not be what I see. 

We all go through seasons in our lives. These seasons are both a continuation of God’s plan in our life and a preparation for the next season. Don’t look at your purpose as this static, one-time calling that should drive you for the rest of your life. There should be a consistent thread to all that God wants you to do, but there is also a variability to the tasks.

One of the seasons in my life was the prison ministry, which taught me to share the Gospel. God used that experience in other endeavors. I wasn’t changing directions; I was honing skills.

PATRICK DAY

Who was Patrick and why do you care?

Patrick Day was a 27-year-old boxer who died of a brain injury in a boxing match on October 14th of this year. “Patrick Day didn’t need to box,”…. “He came from a good family, he was smart, educated, had good values and had other avenues available to him to earn a living.” … “It’s how he inspired people and it was something that made him feel alive.” That is who he was, now why do you care? “Many people live much longer than Patrick’s 27 years, wondering if they made a difference or positively affected their world. This was not the case for Patrick Day when he left us.”

Can people say that about you? Can they say that about me?

I have another short story about one of my stones. I think I may have mentioned that in my early years I was somewhat driven. Actually, I was bullet proof and invisible. I did everything in excess. One of my excesses was running 10 miles a day rain, sleet or shine. It was an endorphin high and an obsession. In the spring of my 30th year I started getting tunnel vision around 4 to 5 miles. I would walk a few steps; it would go away and I would continue running. As it was spring and I wanted to ramp up my running, I went to the doctor to see if I could take something to get rid of this inconvenience.

The inconvenience put me in the hospital for a few days as they ran a complete battery of test to determine the problem. All they knew for sure was that it had something to do with my heart and from the initial signs it was much more dangerous than tunnel vision. They couldn’t find the source. I was told to back off on all exercise. Basically, I was told to sit in a rocking chair and find a good book. As a 30-year-old I needed to act like I was 90. As I mentioned, I was bullet proof and invisible. This is a minor setback. It will go away. They’ll give me a pill and poof, back to normal. …. But, not so much….

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months and no real progress. The problem was getting worse. More tests, maybe this, maybe that… no real answer. I started out with a partial heart block that was slowly turning into something worse.

Then one day

I’m living alone in my apartment watching TV when it happened. Prolonged tunnel vision. The protocol was to call my cardiologist for instructions. Dr. Wickliffe (Charles) was a friend before he was my doctor.

Me “Charles, tunnel vision, kind of long this time.”

Charles “stop doing what you are doing and relax.”

Me “I’m lying on the couch doing nothing, the only thing I can stop doing is breathing.”

Charles “I have a full schedule tomorrow come see me before the office opens, say around 7:30.”

Waiting is not my strong suit, so I decided to go to bed, get up early and see Charles in the morning. What I am going to tell you next is real. I can still see it in my minds eye. It still scares me today. I woke up in the middle of the night looking at myself lying in bed. I was on the ceiling looking down. That was me in the bed. I was awake. My body slowly slid down the wall and onto the bed. I was now looking at a blank ceiling. I laid there drenched with sweat, my heart was jumping out of my chest and I was terrified. I had never experienced anything even close to this in my life and I had no idea what it meant.

Options, what are my options? Stay here alone and maybe die in the night? Not good. I could go to the hospital across the street from Charles’ office and wait for him. Better idea, but how. It’s only a few blocks away (I was living in mid-town at the time), I could walk. Not good, most of it is up hill and would put a strain on my heart. Then I would die in the middle of the street alone and at night. I know, I could drive, but that would put other motorist in potential danger. Idiot, it is the middle of the night, what other motorist? Drive it is.

I walked into the emergency room at Piedmont Hospital around 2 A.M. I really don’t know what I am doing other than I want to be around other people. I don’t want to be alone. This whole thing had become rather confusing. I found a chair and made myself comfortable until Dr. Wickliffe shows up at 7:30. Well as it would turn out, they don’t allow people to “hang out” in the emergency room. The night nurse said “Hey, you’re in or you’re out, choose” … I’m in.

They put me in a small observation room, hooked up an EKG and watched for a while. All’s cool, I’m safe and in good hands. I had a male nurse; he left the room for a few minutes and comes back with a defibrator. For those of you who don’t know what a defibrator is, it’s a heart shock devise. I worked my way through undergraduate in surgery at a hospital. I’ve seen a lot of defibrators and I know what they do.

Me “curiosity, whatcha got that for?”……

nurse “well your heart has stopped three times since you got here. Don’t worry Dr. Wickliffe is on the way.”… que dramatic music….

At this point my brain didn’t have thoughts, it only had half sentences. I think it was oscillating between my natural positive attitude and outright panic. Thank goodness Charles showed up to stabilize my attention. He assured me that everything was going to be fine. I did the right thing…. Yada, yada, yada… I don’t think I was listening. My brain was still having its own convoluted dialog.

Job 33:4 “The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life”

BAM… I hit my head…. Bright lights…. What…. A man in a white mask says, “it’s going to be alright”. My heart had stopped in mid-sentence in the emergency room and they took me directly to surgery. I hit my head as a reaction to them starting my heart back. It was an emergency, they didn’t follow standard protocol, there was no time. In post-op I sat there looking at this big box taped to my arm. It had a blinking red light. Charles said it was my temporary pacemaker. Because of my age they had to order a special pacemaker and it would be here the next day. I had to go back to surgery to have it implanted. But I was and will be fine.

What does all this have to do with Patrick Day? God was extremely compassionate with me. He gave me another chance to be the man he wanted me to be. Patrick was already that man.

The rest of the night I watched that blinking red light. That was my life, it was my future, it was everything I wanted to be, but wasn’t…yet. It took me over a year to get used to the fact I was dependent on an electrical devise implanted in my chest. I was no longer bullet proof or invisible. I was human. It made me look at the past and project it forward. I didn’t like the picture. For the first time in decades I picked up a bible and started to read.

Ephesians 2:10 “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

I wasn’t there yet, but the search had begun. I missed my chance at being Patrick Day, but I could find a way of becoming Tomme Stevenson.

2 Timothy 2:15 “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.”