I sometimes feel invisible. By nature, I’m a worker bee. I prefer to stay in the background. When the spotlight is on me, I’m uncomfortable. I find it hard to accept a compliment. To me, it’s not about humility; it’s about being truthful. It’s not about lacking self-confidence; it’s about being realistic. I am who I am: nothing extraordinary. I can do what God created me to do.
Philippians 2:3: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
Life
So for a guy who likes to live in the shadows, why is invisibility a problem? I struggle with that question. I don’t want fame or recognition for greatness. A couple of decades ago, I changed my life significantly. Up to that point, my life was about me. Not in a selfish way, but in a determined one. I wanted to be the best version of me I could be. I would outwork anyone to achieve that goal. It wasn’t about money, position, or fame; it was about self-respect.
Philippians 2:4: “Not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”
Then one day, God said, “Stop.” He wanted me to realize that life was never about me. It has always been about the people God puts in my path. I was to use all the resources God gave me — intelligence, relationships, experiences, and knowledge — to help others. That lifted an immense weight off my shoulders. I was no longer responsible for results, only for obedience. It was freeing beyond words.
Living in the Shadows
I stepped into the background and have lived there ever since. I like it here. I can do my thing unnoticed. I can create my own version of self-actualization by living vicariously through others’ achievements. The greatest joy of my life is watching others bloom. Every day, I have the joy and privilege of watching people younger than me begin the journey toward becoming the person God always intended them to be. Some of these people are in their twenties.
I think this is the turning point for me. At the same time, I get to see young people experimenting with life, the excitement of discovery, and the joy of becoming. On the other hand, I know they must learn from disappointment and loss.
1 Corinthians 10:24: “Let no one seek his own, but each one the other’s well-being.”
In the middle of this, I get lost. I fade so far into the background that even the shadows forget I’m there. Most of my life, this is OK, even preferred. But not always.
Apathy verse Silence
I don’t know how to present this without sounding at some level arrogant or egotistical. It is not that at all. I have lived an incredible life, with all its ups and downs, knowing how difficult it is to juggle family, work, and community. I understand why I am not the center of anyone’s universe. We are all planets, part of our own solar systems, spinning through one of many galaxies. Life is complex.
1 Thessalonians 5:11: “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”
My downward spiral begins when I forget that silence is not apathy. Many people trying to survive in the chaos of everyday life are silent, not because they don’t care, but because they are distracted. There is a lot to do when becoming something. Figuring out who you should be and how to achieve that goal is time-consuming. Background noise is drowned out by the cacophony of sounds coming from the moment.
Being Seen Again
We all go through moments of feeling lost. It is part of the rhythm of life. As you grow older, you experience this more often. What these people are accomplishing in their lives is something I envy. It took me forty years to learn what they already know. I want to be part of their orbit. When I am not, I feel invisible.
That is, until we meet face-to-face. Then we see each other for who we are and rejoice in that knowledge. The cloak of invisibility falls away, and I am me again. We talk about lives lived, victories won, and the scars left by learning.
Silence is seldom apathy. Sometimes it’s just life being life.
Proverbs 12:25: “Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.”

One unfortunate aspect of God’s love is that He allows us to experience the natural consequences of our sin. If there were no consequences, we would not learn to avoid sin. Sometimes the consequences last long after we have repented.
The single most important thing a leader can give their best people isn’t perks or even money; it’s a goal worth their time. That is an important point. Whether we accept the role or not, as Christians we are leaders. As Christians, we are watched, and people decide whether what we say we believe in is worth investing in.
The basic question one asks when seeking God is: what was there before? As humans with limited knowledge and finite experience, we struggle to grasp something that has no beginning or end. Our minds are wired for sequence—before and after, cause and effect, start and finish. Everything we have ever known fits within that framework.
Fear buries purpose not by force, but by permission. Giving in to the fear of failure hides your ability to reach your potential. Fear is the loud giant roaring in your mind, while faith is that whisper that pushes you forward. Too many times, we listen to the roaring giant because we can’t hear the whisper. We become less than God meant us to be, a shell of who we could have become.
And why is Christ Hard to Believe In?
The parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-30 gives us six great truths.
An opinion is only a state of mind; it does not predict the future. Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines opinion as “a view, judgment, or appraisal formed in the mind about a particular matter.” We too often give too much credence to someone’s opinion, including our own. Many of the disagreements I hear are formed when opinions differ.
“We have met the enemy, and he is us.” Walt Kelly popularized this statement in the comic strip
The scene of the crime is in your mind. What misdeed we discuss doesn’t matter; human behavior starts with a thought. Given the fertilizer of attention, that thought grows into a preoccupation, which in turn bears fruit.