A Memorable Heart

Proverbs 27:2, “Let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth; an outsider, and not your own lips.”

“A memorable heart is the easiest way to immortality.” ― Suzy Kassem

Nothing brings me to my knees faster than attending a memorial service for someone who has lived a life worth living. Several years ago, the son of a friend of mine died unexpectantly at the age of 21. Ryan FitzGerald was a good kid and well-liked. When I went to his memorial service, I expected a big turnout. What I got stunned me. Not only was the auditorium full to overflowing, but young person after young person went up on stage to talk about what Ryan had done for them; everything from facing down bullies to comforting loss. Some of these young people talked about things that had happened many years ago. Some even said that Ryan probably wouldn’t remember coming to their aid. They talked about wolves, sheep, and sheepdogs; Ryan was the sheepdog. He protected the sheep from the wolves.

1 Timothy 6:18, “They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share.”

Yesterday I attended another such memorial. I mentioned Robert before; it was his. Not only was the church full of people showing their respect, but they also told the story of his life. His was a life worthy of praise. I struggled throughout that service to imagine mine. Was I a sheepdog? Have I lived a life worthy of Christ’s sacrifice?

Psalms 127:1, “Except the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman watches but in vain.”

What will others say about you? In both of the examples I mentioned above, it was not just that they were good people. Evil can look appealing if it gives away enough stuff. Good people are better than not-so-good people, but ultimately, they don’t stand out. Their motives still linger like a shadow over their actions. Great people, the type of people that leave a positive impact on generations, are Godly people. They have a way of being good that reflects humility and compassion. Godly people understand where grace comes from. They act as they do, not to please others but to serve their creator in a manner worthy of His sacrifice.

Ephesians 4:1-5, “Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

Interestingly, you can’t be the type of person that wants a great memorial service and have it too. You have to be the type of person who doesn’t care, who doesn’t want the attention, and who only wants to live to please Christ. The main ingredient is always to look outward. Always concern yourself with the welfare of others. When you give yourself completely to servitude for Christ, amazing things start to happen in your life. Both Robert and Ryan would be a little embarrassed by what was said about them. The embarrassment would come because it was not their intent to get recognition. Their intent was to serve.

Matthew 6:1,” Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.”

“Feeling good about yourself is not the same thing as doing good.” ― Theodore Dalrymple.

Nothing I say here is new. It is not surprising that the people we esteem the most are not just charitable people; they are not just good people; they have a little something special that makes them stand out.  There is an assured humility that allows them to bend down to serve while still holding their heads high. They are confident that Christ is in their corner, He will not allow them to be laid low, and He will glorify their efforts. They do not need the accolades of men to motivate them.

Hebrews 13:16, “Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.”

Yet, we struggle to emulate these people. We struggle to believe that our God truly cares for us. Our worldview dictates that we can only do so much and no more. We cannot risk our future or the future of our family beyond a certain point. Serving is not only conditional but relative.

Ryan and Robert innately knew how to serve God unconditionally. For many of the rest of us, it is not that easy. I do ask that you try to ratchet up your efforts so that, over time, you will be embarrassed by the good things people say about you.

Matthew 25:23, “His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’”

Are You Valued the Right Way?

1 Samuel 16:7, “But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.'”

I was told this story by someone who didn’t know who originated it; if you do, let me know, and I will amend this post. It’s a perfect parable for defining personal value.

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A father said to his daughter, “You have graduated with honors; here is a car I bought many years ago.

It is a bit older now, but before I give it to you, take it to the used car lot downtown and tell them you want to sell it and see how much they offer you.

The daughter went to the used car lot, returned to her father, and said, “They offered me $1,000 because they said it looks pretty worn out.”

Now, the father said, “Take it to the pawnshop.” So the daughter went to the pawnshop, returned to her father, and said, “The pawnshop offered only $100 because it is an old car.”

The father asked his daughter to go to a car club and show them the car. The daughter then took the car to the club, returned, and told her father,” Some people in the club offered $100,000 because it’s a Holden Torana and an iconic car and sought by many collectors.”

The father said this to his daughter, “The right place values you the right way,” If you are not valued, do not be angry, it means you are in the wrong place. Those who know your value are those who appreciate you. So never stay in a place where no one sees your value.

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Are you in the right place; are you valued the right way?

When I received my first promotion at work, I thought it was because I was the guy with all the answers. Luckily, I had a boss that corrected me on that. I was a command-and-control manager. It was my way or the highway. John McAlister was my boss; he was an old man of forty-five or fifty with many miles on his tires. He taught me that people needed to learn how to do things within their skill set and personality traits. They couldn’t be me anymore than I could be them. John taught me a lot for an old guy. Fifty years later, I still think of him.

When we are born, the two challenges God gives us are finding out who we are and finding where we fit. We are all God’s Holden Torana’s looking for a home. The world will put a value on you, but if you end up at a used car dealership or a pawn shop, you will never know the actual value of who you are.

Psalm 139:13-15, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. So I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.”

Never underestimate your value to God. You are more precious than gold. If others do not see that in you, do not question yourself; question where in life you are; you are in the wrong place. One of the hardest things we do is abandon what we know for what we do not know, even when what we know isn’t good for us. Spiritual maturity is learning to walk away from people and situations that threaten your peace of mind, Godly self-respect, Christian values, or self-worth. Walking away has nothing to do with weakness and everything to do with strength. You walk away not because you want others to realize your value but because you finally realize your value.

Peter 1:18-19, “Knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.”

My Dad once told me that if I was the smartest guy in the room, I was in the wrong room. Everyone brings something unique to the table. We don’t have all the right answers; we don’t even know all the right questions. We must remind ourselves that sometimes our friends will lie to us, and sometimes our enemies will tell us the truth. Please don’t buy into the lie because it makes life more comfortable; always seek the truth. Those we travel with must see the unique value created within us by Christ. When you recognize your value, you will find it harder to be around people who don’t.

John C. Maxwell says, “Your core value is the deeply held beliefs that authentically describe your soul.” When you doubt your value go to scripture; God will reinforce your value to Him.  Always remember that you are God’s ambassador to the world.

1 Peter 3:4, “But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

Never settle for a life that is less than the one God created for you.