Author: tommestevenson@gmail.com

Overcoming the Old Me in Finding Purpose

Discovering and chasing our purpose can be daunting. We not only have to deal with the uncertainty of what it is, we also have to struggle with why God would choose us in the first place.  I cannot think of a single thing more damaging than a person thinking they are not worthy of their assignment. We need to stop believing that God would never choose us for great things. This is especially true if we have never stepped out in faith.

To a Christian, being worthy is kind of a contradiction. “We are saved by grace not by work so that none may boast” (Ephesians 2:9) There is an unworthiness about us that we cannot deny. It is our sin nature that caused God to come to earth in the image of a man to be humiliated and hung on a cross for our sins. For that we are truly and totally unworthy.

The unworthiness I am talking about here is that small voice in your head that tells you, because of your old sin you will never accomplish anything great for His kingdom. Never. People will always see the old you, the sinner and say “underneath, deep down inside, you are that person”.

David laments in Ecclesiastes 7:20 “Surely there is not a righteous man on earth who does good and never sins.” Paul goes on to say in Romans 7:19 “For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice” We are broken. We start to believe the great Christians who have led hundreds of thousands to Christ are somehow better. More theologically educated, more morally upright, more indwelt by the Spirit.

But 2 Corinthians 5:17 says “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come”. I am not that old me. I still struggle with the ghost of my old sin. It is not so much a fear of going back, as it is a haunting of being there in the first place. I am washed clean by Christ’s blood, but I can’t forget. This living in the past is what can stop me from moving forward.

One of the problems I have with writing this blog is “how can someone with my background have the audacity to publish articles on how to find your true passion in Christ.“. If you follow my lead, it is going to take you about forty years and a there will be lot of collateral damage.

How Do I Move Forward?

Here is how I do it. I do it by admitting I am not Billy Graham. I (me, not you) will never foster a worldwide movement or start a theological seminary. There is a good chance no one will remember my name. Ah but one will…. God will always know my name and my heart… I do it because God sees us in a way that we can never see ourselves. King David, wow, he and Bathsheba… and Bathsheba’s husband…. Paul, attacking the early church, attacking?… persecuting the early church…  Moses, killed a man and had to go into hiding. Everyone has a past.

Earlier I have talked about “Each current season using the last season to build toward the next season”. God does not waste anything. He will use who we were to make us who He wants us to be.  It is the trials, failures and frustration that gives us compassion and empathy for the lost. It is what we went through to find grace that causes us to pursue others. We are seasoned warriors on the battle field of life. Without our scars we would lack credibility.

When I was in the prison yard, I was surrounded by a couple thousand inmates. They were atheists, agnostics, Wiccans, Muslims, and some Christians. I realized that it was my past that gave me credibility to talk about their future. Many felt their sins were beyond redemption. It was because I had sinned and continued to struggle with sin that gave them hope for redemption. My redemption is the story of their redemption.

Writing this makes me think of this quote:

Now, every time I witness a strong person I want to know: “what darkness did you conquer in your story? “, mountains do not rise without earthquakes. – Katherine MacKenett

God is our earthquake. He and He alone can rise us up above who we were to become a movement for Him. We may only be a movement of one, but the ripple effect through eternity will make God jump with joy.

If you have not seen “The Bema”, by Tim Stevenson, you should. Here is the link The Bema . It is a fictional reenactment of 2 Corinthians 5:10 “For we must all stand before Christ to be judged. We will each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in this earthly body.” For a Christian the judgement here is not about our sin, but about what we have done for Christ since we knew Him.  It refers to the Crowns given by Christ to those who have done His will (2 Timothy 4:7-8, 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, 1 Thessalonians 2:19, 20, James 1:12). It does a great job of demonstrating the many ways we can further God’s kingdom here on earth.

We do not have to be Billy Graham; we just need to be the person God made us to be.

1 Corinthians 10:13

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.”

Most Christians want to serve Christ. Once we admit that to ourselves, we immediately say… but…. We want to serve in our way, to the people we choose, within our timetable, using our disposable resources. We do not want to serve an ungrateful people, in some awful environment, using up our hard-earned vacation time. Thinking it is not the same as saying it, …. so we’re good…. Right?

How often do we try to fit the Gospel into our situation rather than fit our situation into the Gospel?

In Romans 8:28 Paul writes “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” To the Ephesians he says in Ephesians 1:11 “Also, we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to His purpose who works all things after the counsel of His will”

I have a purpose. I was created as a unique creature, with specific skills and afforded specific resources to accomplish a unique task. But I have free will in choosing both if and how I will respond. I can accept the fact that I have this unique purpose without actually working to advance it.

Tom Shuler wrote a great book entitled “Metaporphyx”. In it he tries to clarify the process of both understanding and fulfilling God’s purpose in our lives. It looks at this purpose as not a thing, or a single event, but a continuous process that repeats itself. Each cycle building on the last. Each cycle, or season, is punctuated by a pivot point. A pivot point is a critical event that causes us to both reassess and redefine our direction. The redefinition of our direction does not alter our purpose. The purpose remains the same, but the direction constantly changes based on the seasons of our lives.

 So again… what is our purpose?

Here is a hint.

John 15:1-27 says “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vine dresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. “

Our purpose has to do with bearing fruit.  So, what does the Bible say about fruit?

James 2:14-26 says“What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also, faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. But someone will say, “You have faith and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. …”

First of all, the fruit we are looking for comes from the Spirit. Not every good work qualifies. Just those that are created out of an abiding love and obedience to the Spirit. Second, it is active and not passive. We must actually do something. We can not just say “God loves you, go in peace”. We must minister to their actual needs. “So also, faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead”. Dead, as in completely worthless.

So, to summarize this point…. I have a unique and specific purpose for which I was created and that purpose requires that I do something material.

We also know that God will assure our success when we chase His purpose. He says in Philippians 1:6 “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”

I end this thought knowing that whatever my purpose, if I abide in Christ and diligently search, I will be successful. I’m still working the whole purpose thing out, but God has assured me that I will eventually succeed.

Matthew 6:19-21

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Knowing Where to Turn

There is a great struggle in my life as I look to the future. It confronts me from many directions. Am I financially prepared, do I know my true passion, am I gifted to follow that passion, is there an opportunity that I am both qualified for and that wants me? I have people in my life, good and close friends, that perplex me. They are dealing with the same problems but in different ways. Are any of these ways, right?

Proverbs 16:9 says “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” It comes down to knowing God’s will for my future. This is the crux of the problem. I have a very sketchy records for understanding God’s will in my life. I am going to use the word “failure” here as the antithesis of my perception of success. My vision for the future is clouded by a lack of knowledge. So, my view of success and failure share this same shortsightedness.

In 1 Corinthians 2:14 the bible says “The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned.” It also says in Acts “And he said, ‘The God of our fathers appointed you to know his will, to see the Righteous One and to hear a voice from his mouth”  The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit, but God appoints us to know his will, to hear His voice. The challenge seems to be moving from the natural world we are used to, into the Spiritual world in which God speaks.

I could point out many instances where I worked diligently through prayer and council to understand and follow God’s will only to face failure (see above). Now I could assume that because of my attempted faithfulness they were not a failure, I just didn’t see the win. I am afraid that that is a massive assumption that may only serve the purpose of making me feel better concerning my “failure”.  They could, in truth, be a failure. Or… it could have been the will of God that these opportunities were to plant a seed for future success in someone else’s life. I would guess this was communicated to me in Proverbs when the Lord said “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand” Not my purpose but his. I am not forwarding my plans on earth, but His plans.

So, my quandary, my consternation, my confusion, lies in understanding the unknown. I fall back on Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  That future may be eternity with Him, not necessarily to prosper here on earth.

I have to avoid falling back on my understanding of success and rely on God’s even when I don’t know what His is. John 6:63 tells me “It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life.”

I struggle with this a great deal. In the shadows of my mind I know that God will not allow me to fail if I am faithful. That I do not have to know implicitly what he wants me to do. I just need to be obedient to the task before me.

That will have to be enough for now….

Proverbs 16:3

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established