1 Corinthians 13:13, “But now these three things abide: faith, hope, love; but the greatest of these is love.”
There are days when there is both joy and pain in what God tells me. I want some alone time, suppressing everything distracting. But it is not to be, the world will shortly wake up and a new day will begin
.God speaks to me in short sentences that are not easy to remember. The clarity of a moment ago is lost in the present.
I cannot recapture what God has told me this morning, but I will try. It had to do with the importance of love and correspondingly loss. How are these two concepts united? I have a sense of longing for deep, true love. This longing is both good and bad. Good because it is built within all of us to love and be loved. Destructive because that longing can become an obsession. It drives many of us to do things that are contrary to God’s will for our lives. When this happens, we come into conflict with the very God that breathed life into our lungs. This conflict invariably brings pain and a sense of loss.
11 John 4:7-8 “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
Many of us, most of us, and maybe all of us; have come into conflict with love. We have loved mightily and lost. We have felt the searing pain that goes to the very marrow of our bones. It is so intense that we have to remind ourselves to breathe. It so envelops our being that we think that it will never cease. There will be no relief. There are not words or actions that will make it go away. We start to see this pain as an extension of ourselves, part of our DNA. It has permanently transformed us.
The lucky ones overcome this feeling and love again. The unlucky ones live with it in solitude for the rest of their lives.
This morning I look at the relationships in my life. I know that my existence is because God has a purpose for me. I will pursue that purpose with abandon. It is what keeps me going. I also know that all of the deep relationships I have around me will someday bring me a sense of loss. That loss will come through death or disappointment. Just as my passing and possibly my actions will bring suffering to others. All earthly relationships end — the stronger the love, the greater the pain. I will not forsake the love to avoid the pain; it is because God first loved me. God experience incredible pain to show the extent of his love. He gave His son to die on the cross. God will forever live with the knowledge of that sacrifice. It is part of who He is, and it ripples through eternity.
Romans 5:8, “But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
So, I sit here in the darkness of early morning, embraced by the God of the universe, trying to make sense of who and what I am. I am a survivor. Like all survivors, I wear the scars of my battles — the more extraordinary my triumph, the deeper my scares. Death would release me from all of this, but it would rob me of the joy of life. I am an alien here on earth. My home is in heaven.
Philippians 3:20, “For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.”
While I am here, I am driven by love to take as many people as I can home with me. To do this, I must overcome my fear and love them as long and as deeply as humanly possible. My obsession should not be for the comfort of being loved, but the joy of loving.
There will come a day of rest, but not before my work here is done
James 2:18, “But someone will say, “You have faith, and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works.”