I was reminded of a sobering thought today. I was looking through old documents I had written to see if there was something that God would use to speak to me. But instead, I found an MP3 audio file from a few years ago. I very seldom record my thoughts. I used to, but I learned that God wanted me to write them out while they were fresh in my mind. I have a big file of Letters to Myself. So I listened to the recording to see what was so important that I recorded it.
Psalms 36:7, “How priceless is your unfailing love, O God! People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.”
It is hard to describe the enormity of God’s love for us. The fact is he wants all of us to spend eternity with Him. God demonstrates this through His relentless passion for us by constantly pursuing us despite our condition. We can never become so degenerate or lowly that He will stop loving us.
1 John 4:9-10. “This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.”
In the Dark of the Night
I recorded that message at four o’clock in the morning on an IMED trip while in Kyrgyzstan. It started to be about Andrey. Andrey was a student looking to expand his small construction business. Andrey has spent time in a Russian prison. His relationship with God was of the tough love type. God loved him unconditionally, but God had rules, just like everyone. In Andrey’s life, anything that came easy wasn’t worth having. He had spent his life overcoming. There was something about that man I loved. But he dropped out of the program because he couldn’t understand why we had to know so much about him. His leaving deflated me because we could have done so much for him, and his testimony was incredible.
2 Timothy 1:9, “He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time.”
I sometimes get off subject and have to serpentine my way back, I‘m told; here is the tie-in. In this recording, talking about Andrey made me think more about myself. I had built this narrative around my life that had to do with God loving me so much that He saved me so I could help others. I didn’t die in the Emergency Room because God had a plan for me. It was a plan to serve others and expand His Kingdom. Andrey taught me that it was a faults narrative. It wasn’t about High Tech Ministries, Champions for Life, International Mission Connection, or Roswell Day of Hope. All of that would have been just as effective without me.
The Sobering Thought
The sobering thought was this, had I died that night, I would have spent eternity separated from God. I would be in Hell. God could do everything I have done since then without me. He did not need me; I needed Him. I just didn’t realize it yet. It was several years before I fully understood that I needed Him. I spent the immediate years after getting my pacemaker lamenting my loss of invincibility. Before that night, I was bulletproof and invisible. There was nothing I could not achieve. Now I was battery operated.
1 John 3:1, “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.”
Andrey reminded me that he survived a Russian prison so that he could be saved. He didn’t see himself as the next Martin Luther. Instead, he saw himself as a child of God trying to please his Father. As Christians, we sometimes become arrogant in our beliefs. We start to think that we are one of the critical gears in God’s machinery. We can’t seem to accept that we exist because He loves us. Sure, He wants us to spread the Gospel, but His primary motivation is love for us.
1 John 4:16, “And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.”
We all have an expiration date. Unfortunately, we don’t know when that is. Sharing God’s story is so that others may be saved before it is too late. We don’t know when that is. We don’t know when that is for ourselves, our family, co-workers, and friends. God can do everything you have accomplished and more without you. We can not change His plan, but we can decide to be part of it.
Ecclesiastes 9:1, “So I reflected on all this and concluded that the righteous and the wise and what they do are in God’s hands, but no one knows whether love or hate awaits them.”
Living is about getting to salvation and finding our way home and helping others find their way home. God loves us unconditionally; He wants to be with us for eternity. And that, folks, is a sobering thought.