Another part of my life that needs evaluation this coming year is my perception of seeking the truth or validation. In the last half-century, I have seen the normalization of division. This division is now evolving into anger and sometimes violence toward others. It started with the benign postmodern concept that you have your truth, and I have mine. This concept started as a peaceful way of avoiding conflict. We did not have to agree; you believe what you want, and I will believe what I want.
Ephesians 4:2, "Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love."
God’s truth always agrees with itself. – Richard Sibbes
Validation
The “unexpected consequence” of this type of thinking is a division of thought. Groups of people started drifting away from each other. We gravitate toward those who think like we do, engaging in group intelligence, crowd wisdom, groupthink, and deindividuation. We stop looking for truth and start looking for validation, instead pursuing anything that makes us feel better about our opinions and avoiding anything that conflicts with them. It is called confirmation bias and is the tendency to search for, interpret, favor, and recall information in a way that confirms or supports one’s prior beliefs or values.
We exasperate this by passing on our opinions about politics, war, global warming, social justice, and religion, to name a few, as truths because it is all we know. In this, we become intolerant of those who think differently wanting to educate them on our truth. But are we seeking the truth or validation? Interestingly, God warned us about this thousands of years ago.
Matthew 12:36, "I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak."
It is natural to have an opinion. It is virtuous to have that opinion grounded in scripture. Sometimes, finding a scriptural foundation for a worldly issue is challenging. In those cases, it is important to tread lightly. The issue is not so much the validity of your opinion, although that is important, as it is spreading that opinion. We treat ordinary conversation as just that, while many conversations are just gossip. We attempt to convince someone that our opinion is more than our opinion, but the truth. Having them accept our “truth” validates our opinion. And in that, we feel validated.
James 1:26, "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless."
Truth
This year, I am trying to avoid careless talk, this includes careless self-talk. The more I entertain a careless thought, the more I am convinced it is true. One of the activities I need to engage more is understanding the other side. I don’t like this because I don’t like what they say, I don’t like their logic, and more importantly, I’m afraid they will make sense. Sometimes, your friends will lie to you, and sometimes, your enemies will tell the truth. I need to find common ground and then evaluate the differences. To accomplish this, I must be willing to open up with those who do not share my beliefs and values. If I can understand why they don’t, I may better understand how to present my view more positively. I must accept that sometimes we don’t have enough information to know the truth. In those situations, I need to keep my opinion to myself.
Ephesians 4:29-32, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."
We are Christians created in the image of God. It is a demanding standard to live up to, but it is what we were created to do. We are the peacemakers. It is not about abandoning our principles or values but finding a positive approach to speaking the truth.
Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”