Silence is the medium of loss, rage, disappointment, and resignation. It begins when the heart loses language, and even the most eloquent become wordless in suffering.
Dale Earnhardt Jr. said, “I’ve spent my life hearing noise, but nothing hits harder than the silence that tells the story words cannot carry.”
John 16:33, “I have said these things to you, so that in me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
The Paradox
One of the paradoxes God gives us is love. Love lifts us to emotional heights that act like drugs in our brains. It has been described as flying or falling. The paradox is that when love is lost, the same chemistry that caused euphoria now results in unbearable pain.
The greater the love, the greater the pain.
God doesn’t just ask us to love; He commands it. And obedience to that command makes us vulnerable to pain. To step into another’s life is not to fix their pain, but to share it. It is to let them know they are seen, noticed, and not alone.
Sometimes it feels like sitting across from a friend who has suffered a devastating loss, with nothing in your hands and nothing on your tongue. No scripture quoted, no wisdom offered, no attempt to rescue them from their grief. Just presence, shared air, and the quiet acknowledgment that something sacred and terrible has happened, and you are willing to stay there with them.
2 Timothy 2:3, “Share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus.”
Creative Silence vs. Raging Silence
I am a man who loves solitude, venturing into the woods where God’s creatures abound, and the only sounds are distant birds singing and a gentle wind rustling through the leaves. It is during these quiet moments that clarity surrounds me. This is the creative silence of God’s calling, not the raging silence of loss. Creative silence allows my mind to lower its defenses and think freely about the issues I carry. The raging silence of loss is like a fortified castle, with its drawbridge up, preventing anyone or anything from entering. It is frozen, mid-sentence, staring into a black void of thought.
I see it in eyes that no longer meet mine, in conversations that end after a single sentence, and in people who once spoke freely but now only answer when spoken to.
2 Corinthians 1:4, “He encourages us in every trouble, so that we may be able to encourage those who are in any trouble, through the very encouragement with which we ourselves are encouraged by God.”
The Challenge
Loving one another is one of the most critical and challenging commands God has given us. Loving God and loving others both cost us. One requires surrender. The other requires vulnerability. Neither is easy, but both are commanded. Love is sacred because it wounds and heals at the same time.
Galatians 6:2, “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”
Entering someone else’s silence requires courage. You must face the unknown, stepping into a realm that’s difficult to understand, with pain whose source is unfamiliar and not easily grasped. The aim isn’t to understand or seek answers but to connect. It’s about offering the warmth of human kindness when the world feels cold. It’s about sitting quietly with silence. And it is about the strength within you given by Christ.
Ephesians 3:19-21, “and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”